My husband allows his teenage son (16) to spend hours alone in his bedroom with his girlfriend, no one checks on them and the girlfriend has free reign of our home too. I'm told that it's my husband's son and not mine, that I should stay out of it. But this is MY home too and my feelings and principles are being ignored

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♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 03/04/2015

13,211

21

2014

And what was done in the form of family blending/counseling when you first initiated this relationship?

TBH, if there was not some work done at the beginning, you're not going to accomplish much now, unless you can get your husband on the same page with you.

Good luck

Katherine - posted on 03/04/2015

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Four and a half years; I came with my own son who is now 20 and at university. My stepson has shown no respect for me since day 1, and it seems like he will forever control our home and our lives. For a few months he was at his mothers until she sent him back here 10 days ago because she had had enough. Unfortunately this was the day AFTER we signed a contract with a realtor to sell our house! So now we have moved into the basement apartment; with new carpeting and a major cleanup down here, we cannot risk it being turned into a dope den like my stepson has done in the past. Really, I am just staying out of his way now, and hoping my husband will open his eyes.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 03/04/2015

13,211

21

2014

How long have you been in the home, and what steps have you taken to try to mitigate the situation?

Joann Torres - posted on 03/04/2015

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Girl, what you need to do is to sit with your husband and talk about this. Tell him that it is your home too and that if your rules and feelings are being ignored, then no point of having his son there. In regards to the son's girlfriend, chase her out and never let her set foot inside your home again. Talk to the girl's parent and tell them about what their daughter is doing and if no action taken by them, then go home pack your stepson's bag in front of your husband's face, walk out the door, and then put it out on the front door and tell your stepson to leave. If your husband argues back, go to your bedroom pack his bag, walk to the door, then put it next to his son's bag then tell them to both leave and then close the door in front of their face. Your husband will finally get some sense knocked into him and will come to realize that you mean business.

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