My husband and i adopted a baby girl from birth..... the mom didnt know whe was pregnant until she was 6 months along :(

Arlee - posted on 04/23/2015 ( 7 moms have responded )

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we are tired and frustrated......our baby climbs out of the crib while we are sleeping and shes usually stripped out of her diaper and pjs, she dumps all drinks out on the floor after 1 drink, she ignores us when we talk to her, she hates being hugged or cuddled ..... we want to hold and play with her but she ignores us or runs to a corner to play, she bites and screams a lot.....she has her loving moments and friendly moments but not very often...... plus she loves to climb every thing which really scares me.... she is a ball of energy for about 16 hours a day and needs constant supervision..... any advice would be greatly appreciated

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Dove - posted on 04/23/2015

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Definitely look into the FAS or other possible issues and get some help if there is something deeper going on. Patience and consistency will be your best friends no matter if she has extenuating issues or not. Hang in there!

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Arlee - posted on 04/23/2015

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I realize that the climbing out of her crib and lack of clothing are normal.....and we are waiting for intervention services.....and yes I believe she was in fact born with FAS... :) when we try to redirect or say "no" to her she pulls on her own hair and cries.... I try to hug her and tell her not to hurt her self but she squirms out of my arms and runs away

Dove - posted on 04/23/2015

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She sounds like a fairly typical young toddler... If she can climb out of her crib you either need to look into those crib tent things or get her into a regular bed (mattress on the floor works just fine) as it is NOT safe for her to be climbing out of her crib.
Give her sippy cups and/or only put an ounce of liquid in them at a time... the only liquid allowed outside of sit down meals and snacks should be water.. so it's no big deal if it gets dumped.
Give her safe outlets for her climbing desires and look into playgroup types of things, so she can get out of the house and run out her energy.
If she bites... firmly tell her 'ouch, no biting, be gentle' and then SHOW her what gentle is by taking her hand and stroking your cheek w/ it. You can also say 'biting is for food'... you can also teach her words to express herself if she is biting out of anger and frustration.

And yes... she does need constant supervision... that's normal.

Sarah - posted on 04/23/2015

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A really good book that I would recommend you read is "The Connected Child" by Karyn Purvis. Another thing I would highly recommend doing if you have not done so is doing some research on FAS (Fatal alcohol syndrome). With FAS you have to parent and discipline differently because the frontal lope of their brain is damaged. That is where we get cause and effect, so those with FAS can't understand cause and effect.

Trisha - posted on 04/23/2015

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What sort of resources have you looked into for fetal alchohol syndrome?

It is likely that there is no actual mental issues that was caused from the drinking. It looks like you are dealing with pretty typical toddler behavior.

The dumping out drinks after 1 drink, and climbing everywhere sounds exactly like my friends 2 year old... So... That is normal.

Just try to find ways to cope with each individual problem.

See here regarding the dumping: http://www.circleofmoms.com/toddlers/dum...

If you look online, you will find a lot about toddlers being resistant to affection.

Also, the climbing out of the crib seems very standard as far as I can see with a quick google search.

Yay toddlers. lol...:)

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 04/23/2015

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She was probably born with fetal alcohol syndrome. Have you had her in treatment for that?

The climbing out of the crib at this age: Totally normal. Time to transition to a toddler bed. Stripping down: Totally normal. Consistency and redirection are key here. Same with the drinks. Consistent redirection and telling 'no'.

Probably doesn't like cuddles because of a sensory disorder, which usually is related to FAS. I'd recommend getting pediatrician's opinion on treatment for FAS.

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