My husband doesn't want to plan on having a 3rd child?

Toni - posted on 06/19/2012 ( 7 moms have responded )




This is crazy my husband doesn't want to plan to have a third child. He just wants to see what happens. Its crazy if we plan then we know when it will happen. Are there any other woman out there with husbands that feel the same way? Just wants to keep having unprotected sex and live life dangerously and see what happens. I'm upset now because I cant get him to nail down on having a 3rd, I recently lost an ovary and a Fallopian tube. The Dr. asked me if I wanted to have more children and until then I hadn't really thought about it I had just had a baby girl 3 mths prior. But when he asked me he made me think do I? and I do. I took a test today and negative I'm disappointed but I don't know what to do about it. I guess just keep trying.Any advice will help. Thank u ladies.


Sherri - posted on 06/20/2012




Yup that is how 3 out of my 4 were conceived. I never truly planned on any of my kids, yet I we never used protection so we knew it could happen at any time and were fine if it did or didn't.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 06/20/2012




I have to agree with Jodi. I don't understand how having unprotected sex is NOT planning on another. It sounds like that is the plan. I think your husband is being sensitive to the fact that it may be difficult for you to conceive due to losing an ovary. I can see why he would not want to plan it, simply because it may bring a lot of disappointment if you are unable to conceive. I actually think he is being quite sensitive to your situation. I get why he would not want to officially plan it, but say what happens happens. I mean, if you are having unprotected sex, then that means you are trying.

Lisamarie - posted on 06/20/2012




Hi, yes my hubby is the same. We have two children and both times, although we were he never admitted that we were trying. I have PCOS so getting pregnant can be difficult, I told people both times but we are currently "trying" for another and this time I chose not to tell anyone because we don't know when it will happen, it took a year and a half to have our daughter and over two years to have our son.
I know how you feel, sometimes my husband just doesn't seem interested and I think "is he just doing this for me?" but then other times he'll say something about getting a new car to fit 3 children in and I think "yeah, he's on board." But it can get so confusing! Sorry, I have no advice except a friendly virtual hug that says "It's ok, I know how you feel!" :-)


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~♥Little Miss - posted on 06/20/2012




Oh, as a side note, no matter how hard you try, you can never truly plan on a baby. You never know when you will get pregnant once you start trying.

[deleted account]

Men are strange creatures... perhaps he is being a bit non-committal because although he does want a third child, he doesn't want to pin his hopes on it just in case it doesn't happen. Just "go with the flow" and if all goes well, you will have your third baby. Best of luck to you.

Jodi - posted on 06/20/2012




If you want another child, how is having unprotected sex living life dangerously? Even if you plan it you can never know what happens. There are never any certainties in life.

Anyway, I do wish you luck, but remember, if it doesn't happen, the two you have are precious too, and if was meant to be, it was meant to be.

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