Beverly - posted on 06/08/2013 ( 17 moms have responded )
My husband and i have had our problems thats for sure, and i love him dearly, but he drinks so much that its hard to put up with. But i do, but since i had my daughter he started a few yrs after to go every wk end to do something away from home, golf, fishing, hunting , yu name it, i begged him to stay home at times and asked to please even to give us 1 day a wk with him for family time. Then it just got worse and worse for him to be doing things with friends more and more, even if he was at home during the wk , working out side in the barn, he would be drinking till drunk. Then hunting season and every wk end he was gone, i tried going and enjoyed until it would be just about drinking and drinking.
Anyway, one wk end he tied our horses legs with a rope and pulled it out from under him and the horse fell and he pulled the rope and put a 2 inch deep laceration on his back part of the foot. Then he had a friend who brought his horse over and he did the same thing, brought the horse to our house, he was drunk as well, put the horse on the ground the same way, and then jumped on top of the horse and pounding on it with a sledge hammer, and jumping on the horses neck. I was so upset, and told him to have him leave, and then we got into an arguement about it because it to me it was animal abuse, and i was talking to my mom and she told me i should call the police, so i did.
So after this he was mad, but then our relationship goes up and down for yrs, and he left me on VD once for a trip, once on xmas till new years all because he was upset, and never talked to me about any of it.
So i left a few times but let him know , because i wanted to help my son who is in the military take care of his house, and i thought it would be a good break, and i felt releaved.
then i came back and we started arguing one night and he was screaming at me and me at him and he told me go ahead call the cops , thats what you do best, and i said no, no, and we kept arguing so i said fine, and i was so upset , i thru my Iphone on the bed, i hit the emergency call button, but did not call the police, so the police called my phone and my husband answered, because i refused, and he told them it was just a little arguement, but they had to come out, the officer asked what was going on, we said just were arguing and upset , so he asked if i felt like i was in danger and out of being angry i said yes, then my husband got upset and asked my daughter to tell the office if he had ever hit me, she said no, so then i told the officer i was sorry, no i know he would never ever hit me, i was just upset . I didnt mean to call . so we went outside, and talked and he asked us to just sleep in differant areas , and that my husband seem to have his priorities messed up. That drinking and parting at his age is immature.
now my husband and i are separated and i want to wk it out, and see a counselor or do a program at home, like marriagemax or savemymarriagenow program, but he wont do anything, he is angry at me, and wont even let me come to the house. I have to call to see my daughter who is 21 to meet her. , he says he doesnt want any drouble from me and that if i go there he will call the cops. I cant get him to change his mind about getting help on our marriage. should i give up? was i wrong to call the police on my spouse for the abuse ? I dont know how to feel, except mostly confused, alone, sad, missing him, and wanting it to wk, i try talking to him and its all anger and he says no no no, I want my life back, so leave me alone, i want a divorce. I dont want a divorce . I love him very much, and i know it can wk, if we do things together, but i dont know how to reach him. Please let me know