My life has come to a stand still

Linda - posted on 01/15/2015 ( 3 moms have responded )

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Here I am yet another night of cant sleep with the same though HOW IS MY SON DOING TONIGHT. I find someday's I just cant I have to stop and I cant move. My son is sitting in Jail and when you have no one to talk to you pretty much go crazy. tonight I went on the web to try and find a book on how to deal and found this sight. I know I am not the only one but I feel like I am. My son is a good person kind and sweet got mixed up in drugs not taking so much as selling. Seeing all the money they lose there minds. They think they are untouchable...At least my son did and I guess looking back the signs were there I just didn't want to see them. This has put a stop to my life two years ago
Now, two years have gone by and I am lost. Lucky my son is in a small town jail so its not so bad but its the waiting. Waiting for the end to find out how much and where he is going to spend that time. In his favor except this he has no record... I am told that is a good thing in his favor.
I think its not being able to talk to someone I feel lost. My friends think he is working on the other side of the country. I find I am so upsetting all the time and the weight it has put on me the feeling I cant do enough to make this time easy for him..My daugther says Im crazy to stop but I can't. working a part time job to just have the money to send him and the stuff he needs..AND HE ALWAYS NEEDS...where and when does it stop. Lets not forget the guilt I feel when I can send him money or I send just a little. if anyone out there can share how they have coping with this please please share.

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♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 01/16/2015

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Perhaps you should look into counseling and al-anon, which is a support group for families victimized by drugs and alcohol.

Lying to your family and peers will not make this situation any easier on you, and in fact, will make it more difficult for you to get through, as you have to try to keep up the lie. Tell your friends the truth. If they don't remain your friends, then you didn't need that person in your life to begin with.

Lying to yourself isn't good either. You've told your family/friends these lies because you can't face (within yourself) that your son made poor choices. He's an adult, and his choices are his to make. You couldn't have changed that. Be honest with yourself.

When he finishes his sentence, I also recommend that he move away from the situation, into a new place where he will not have any connections to get back into business. This will be tough on you as well, but the best thing for him to do to stay straight.

Linda - posted on 01/16/2015

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Thank you but I have try to tell 3 people I though would understand but it didnt work out that way.

Gena - posted on 01/16/2015

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I havent been in the same situation. Would it not be better for you to tell your friends the truth?Then you could speek with them. Maybe it would be a good idea to go to counseling to help you deal with your feelings.Good luck!

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