My little brother

Abbi - posted on 01/27/2015 ( 25 moms have responded )

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I am only 14 and i have a little brother who is scared of his dad cause he is a police officer(he is my stepdad,my dad died in the army when i was 2) and i don't know what to do.

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Michelle - posted on 02/01/2015

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Abbi: like you have been told, stop flagging posts that you don't agree with. If you don't know what "soliciting" is then don't flag a post a soliciting when it clearly isn't.
You aren't qualified to help your little brother so tell your Mother he needs proper help.

Meagan - posted on 02/01/2015

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U need to live YOUR life! The way u have responded to the other moms proves u are not mature enough to be taking care of the kids and their emotional needs. No1 at ur age has the necessary life skills. Be a kid!

Rebecca - posted on 01/31/2015

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You're only 1-2 years older than my oldest daughter, actually, my only daughter. I'm not always home, but I make sure she helps her brothers. It's not her job to 24/7 be always there, but at least 45% percent of help is from my daughter and the rest is from me and my husband...

In case you're curious, my daughter is a seventh grader and has a brother and a cousin, living together. They get along great, but still, I'd never let my daughter ALONE helping her siblings and cousins if it comes to something important...

Michelle - posted on 01/31/2015

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I let my 2 older ones stay home during the school holiday while I work but I am home every night to cook dinner and we spend 2 days a week together (my days off). On Mondays I am the school Mum and run 2 out of my 3 to dancing and after school activities. My oldest is almost 14 but there is no way I would expect him to almost "raise" his siblings, it's not fair on him. It was MY choice to have children so it's MY responsibility to raise them.

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Abbi - posted on 02/01/2015

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So your calling me and idiot...???Real smart don't be calling yourself that👌Im js but I'm going now you guys can QUIT responding to my post now,Thanks😂.

Dove - posted on 02/01/2015

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Then get off the computer and LIVE your life. lol My only problem is that every time there is a school break bored little kids come and troll on this site and act like idiots.

Abbi - posted on 02/01/2015

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Everyone just needs to live their life while i live mine she has new hours now and she will be home for us kids,You guys must have a big problem,i love taking care of my siblings.

Dove - posted on 02/01/2015

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Ugh... is the weekend over yet? I hate it when little kids come and troll out of boredom... lol

Abbi - posted on 02/01/2015

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Whatever,You people just need to go live your life so i can live mine,Okay bye now

Abbi - posted on 01/31/2015

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Im not really sure what will happen,if she wants to live with you or her mom its her choice,no1 can't make her choice for her.Idrk what else to say lol

Dove - posted on 01/31/2015

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Sweetie... you came on a site full of grown mothers and asked for advice. What did you expect? If everything was fine the way it was you would NOT be on a mom's site asking for help....

Seriously... get off the computer and go be a kid.

Abbi - posted on 01/31/2015

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First of all they are home at night they are home when i (we) wake up and after school she is home from 11pm at night to 3pm in the afternoon she just needs her hours changed she is home with the baby and gets her sleep but when at 11 at night is when she gets home all she needs is her hours changed (her shift)And i like being an older sibling and help let them grow and i DONT need a consoler or anyone I'm just fine just the way i am,i like to help and i want my younger siblings to grow into what I'm becoming not anyone else cause i am a good kid and I've had chance after chance to just let my mom take care of my younger siblings not me or anyone else,cause I'm actually a nice person and want to help raise them into what me and my older siblings are becoming not some idiot

Dove - posted on 01/31/2015

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You are only a year older than my oldest... and yes, she helps out w/ her younger brother on occasion, but it is NOT her job to be taking care of him... It is her job to be a kid and do kid things and help out 'some' in the house...

The fact that you are on a mom's site asking about help for your younger brother speaks VOLUMES about how your parents really aren't there for you. I'm sorry for the situation you are in. Perhaps you can seek help from your school guidance counselor to see if they can get your parents involved in your lives the way they should be.

Michelle - posted on 01/31/2015

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I'm not criticizing you, I am your parents choices. It's 1 thing to be earning good money and providing material things for your children but children also need their parents around and actually being in their life.
I would rather be earning less and be with my children than be earning a heap of money and miss so much of their lives.

Abbi - posted on 01/31/2015

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Ok well they need different hours in their shift,i have said it many of times and it is not sad that our parents have good jobs and ARE supporting us,they are good parents just bc they aren't here most of the time doesn't mean they are bad/horrible parents,they support us children every step of the way and we support them,we are very good kids and yes they are here sometimes at home but barely rarely and thats fine cause when we r at home we have fun,yes i am old enough to take care of my siblings,you don't need to criticize me,Thankyou

Michelle - posted on 01/31/2015

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You are still a child yourself, you aren't old enough.
It's very sad that your parents aren't there for you children. Especially a 1yo, needs to have her parents around. It's also very unfair for you, you should be enjoying your childhood, not being a parent to your siblings.

You did flag my post as I am a moderator and it showed me who flagged it as rude language. But either way it doesn't matter.

Abbi - posted on 01/31/2015

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No i did not flag anything,i don't even know how to do that but anyways and our mom and my stepdad his dad have talked before all of us have and i am old enough for the life skills i have a 1yr old sister and i have basically tooken her in my own hands cause our parents are at work 24/7

Michelle - posted on 01/31/2015

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No need to flag as rude language as it isn't. I didn't swear at you.
What I was trying to say is that it is his parents that should be talking to him about what he is scared of and helping overcome those fears.
Sorry, you are only 14 and don't have the life skills to really help him.

Abbi - posted on 01/31/2015

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It is also my job,i like to help and keep my little brother safe and our mom is at work everyday till after she drops us off at school and picks us up from school then she has to go straight back to work,i try to help and thats what they expect us to do.

Michelle - posted on 01/31/2015

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Really, this isn't your job, it's your Mother's job to be helping her children overcome fears and guide them.

Abbi - posted on 01/31/2015

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He is 9 years old and no he doesn't abuse us or anyone,he is actually very helpful and thats also what i think is that he is afraid that he is going to get shot or hurt on his job,he is a daddy's boy but he a little scared and recently Springfield,MO there was a police officer shot he thought it was his daddy but it wasn't and we live in Monett,MO which he still thinks he goes to Springfield for his work,which he doesn't but its going a little better than it was a couple weeks ago,Thanks.

Abbi - posted on 01/31/2015

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Well I'm his older sister and i think it is because of his job,I'm not for sure,he has got a little better,we go for rides in the police car and he is getting used to it and asking more and more everyday to go for these rides,recently we went to six flags as a whole family (we have more siblings) and he actually did pretty good.

[deleted account]

First off, I'm sorry to hear about your dad. But hope that your step dad treats you well. What exactly scares your little brother (how old is he by the way?) about his dad? Is it because of his job? Like being scared he will get hurt while on duty? Is he abusive, like does he hit him?

My advice would be to sit down with your brother and ask him what scares him about his dad. If he's worried he may get hurt while on the job, tell him that his dad is brave to be able to go out there and be a police officer. He makes the world a safer place for you and him. It's normal to be scared, every one gets scared. But things will be OK. If he says other things that may worry you, then either tell your mom or step dad and they can have a chat with him.

You're a great big brother. You're still young, don't try to carry to much on your shoulders. It's OK to be there for your brother, but if it gets too much and you don't think you can handle it, please speak to someone you know and trust. Good luck!

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