My mom wants to control how many kids I have

[deleted account] ( 6 moms have responded )

I want other people's advice on this. I am happily married with 2 sons. We own a home and do not rely on anyone else financially. Anway, my mother practically every day mentions to me how I should be good with just having two kids and that I should never have any more because they are expensive and time consuming. She wants me to only have two children and is set on this number for me. I don't understand why she is obsessed with how many kids I have? I'm 31 years old. Also, she continuously talks about how I should be SO happy that I have two boys and didn't have any girls because girls are horrible, whiny, mean as teens and boys are just better?! I don't know where she got these thoughts from and it makes me feel like she didn't like having me as a daughter ( I have two brothers). I also don't know if she's saying all this to persuade me from having a third child just in case it is a girl? I don't know what to think.... especially since my mom had 3 kids herself.

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Lena - posted on 08/15/2017

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Unless your mother is force feeding you birth control, then it is your life. Your grown and she has no business in your personal decisions. Come on, think about it. If your husband is aware of her controlling your family size and he's ok with it, then that's a problem right there. If he is NOT ok with it, then you need to decide whose team your on, your mom's or your husbands???

Sarah - posted on 08/12/2017

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My MIL felt like this as well, and I had four! It really isn't her business, as long as you aren't relying on her for childcare or financial support. I think Michelle's response is spot on.

Michelle - posted on 08/12/2017

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Next time she starts my reply would be: "Yes, I heard you the last 100 times you told me and I haven't decided if I have finished having children. Do you regret having me? It sounds like you do."
Sorry, but I don't have a close relationship with mu Mum and I wouldn't tolerate her saying those things at all. It would have put her in her place ages ago, but that's me.

[deleted account]

Maybe you could sit her down and talk to her and talk to her about it...there has to be a reason whay she is feeling the way she is.

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