my mother wants my 6 year old to live with her.

Hope - posted on 08/17/2013 ( 4 moms have responded )

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My mother has wanted my 6 yr old to be with her since she was born. Saying you can have another baby. And despite what I say or how I say I to her, she acts like she is the victim or that I am trying to keep my daughter away from her. My mother did not raise me or my brothers and we have all tried to get to know her as adults. I am frustrated because now my daughter wants to go. My mother has made her a room and has 'brainwashed' her into telling others her home is with grammy. I try to keep them apart now because I dont know what else to do. Therapy is not an option because of the expense and my mother does not believe she needs to go. Also i am pregnant with my second child. Any advice?

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Dove - posted on 08/17/2013

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I would cut off all contact for the time being.... and re-evaluate if my mother were willing to get psychological help.

Granted, I realize that relationships w/ extended family can be very important to a child, but even YOU weren't raised by this woman. It 'sounds' like she is trying to make up for lost time by taking your child away from you and that is not the actions of a sane woman. Don't risk your child's emotional well being here.

Ev - posted on 08/17/2013

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Are you with the child's father? What does he have to say about it? Have you discussed this issue with your siblings to see what they think about it?

I would say that its time to keep visits with grammy short and sweet. Be there when your daughter is seeing her grammy. Make sure that grammy knows that under no certain circumstances is your daughter going to live with her nor is she going to stay over night either. Tell your mom she had her chance to raise her kids and made her choices in it. She may be regretting them and wanting to try again but she can not legally have your child unless you are such an unfit parent and she is the only option to raise the child. That being said, unless she can prove such a thing....she has no grounds to order you to give over a child just because she wants to raise someone else's kid.

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Hope - posted on 08/17/2013

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My ex and I are not together but get along very well. We co parent easily. He also gets along well with my fiance with whom my daughter and I live with now. Our home is always clean and happy. We do things together all the time. Tonight is skate night and tomorrow we are attending a bday party at a splash pad. We also play family game night games, read and cook together.
My mother has 7 indoor dogs and her idea of cleaning is moving things from one room to another.
She still believes laela should be with her.
My brother with children lives 8 hours away and my other brother thinks my mom is crazy and not serious. My ex and fiance think she is serious and say to just keep her away.
I wish my mom would just get it together and act like a grandma.

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