My own children treat me awful and have little contact with me

Sandy - posted on 06/23/2013 ( no moms have responded yet )

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I have heavy heartache everyday. I have a 25 year old daughter, 24 year old son, and a 15 year old daughter. The problem is, they rarely want anything to do with me anymore. I was divorced from my 15 year olds father since 2005. He was an alcoholic, abusive, verbally, mentally to all my kids. My 15 yr old was 6 when we divorced. I have been through a lot with my kids, my oldest daughter, started stealing, lying etc, at 16. She has had 2 DUI's wrecked my car 5 times, raped with my granddaughter in the room (at 1 yr old), shot at in my car 12 times, etc. I had a stalker for 7 years which caused me to develop PTSD. I have been an RN in the ER for 20 years. The problems with my oldest daughter have caused much pain, for me. I remarried for 4 years, then was told he did not love me anymore and I had to move out. I had no other place to go than with my mother n law, my 15 yr olds grandmother and her fathers mother. This was in the country, and I thought this would be good for the both of us. The problem was, her father lived across the street. Everything was going well. Let me remind you that from 2004-2013, he never saw our daughter unless I drove the 4 hr trip to take her to see him. He came over to my mother n laws house one night drunk, and kicked me out of her house at 1 in the morning and told me I could not take my daughter. I tried, but he got violent and I had to leave. Nowhere to go, I slept in my car. My ex husband let me stay temporarily. I went out there the following week and took her out if school. I had custody of her. My ex called me the next day stating if I did not bring her back, I would have a warrant out for kidnapping which was a felony. Stupid me believing this since he used to be a cop, took her back. I then hired an attorney to try and get her back but my ex shows up in court and had no attorney so it was postponed. I did not have any money to continue the custody issue, so I had to drop the case. I went out to pick her up for her 15 birthday and spend the weekend with her. When I walked in with my oldest daughter, there was my ex mother n law who is 65 smoking pot in front of my daughter. I was very upset about the entire ordeal. I then was told I had to bring her back the following morning so they could celebrate her birthday. Her birthday was 2 weeks before I got to pick her up, and was told I could not see her on her original birthday because they were celebrating it then. Well, this time I sent my ex a message stating I want to speak to both him and his mother regarding the pot smoking in the living room while my daughter was there. When I arrived the next morning to drop her off, I was told to come inside my ex mother n laws house where my daughter has lived. As I walked in they started yelling, hitting, kicking me, till I fell to the ground. Then my ex mother n law started kicking me in the head, while my ex husband and his new wife were kicking me in the legs. They grabbed my legs, and pulled me outside and threw me off the porch. Then my ex mother n law came up to me and punched me in my mouth. My daughter saw everything. I was told to leave and never come back. I drove down the street and called the police to report the use of drugs and the assault. Since that day, I can not go see my daughter. I have called CPS 3 times but each report was lost. The police dismissed my assault case stating I was lying. Since then, my daughter has chosen to stay out there and have no contact with me. I am at a loss. My heart is broken. I raised her alone all those years, now I have to give her up to an alcoholic father and a pot smoking grandmother. How am I supposed to feel, act, keep going on everyday. She has cavities that aren't being taken care of, she is depressed. I am so sad. Any comments would be helpful. I feel like I don't have any children anymore. My 25 yr old swears at me all the time. My son is in the Navy with very little contact with me. How can today's kids be so mean and cruel to their mother, whom cared, fed, clothed them their entire life. I don't know what else to do.....

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