Ariana - posted on 10/07/2012 ( 1 mom has responded )
I live with my mom right now (pay half of everything, just can't afford to be on my own right now). She watches my son while I go to school (she works nights) so she spends a bunch of time with him.
I find whenever we're in a room together my son
1. acts out more, and
2. favours her over me
He will cry for her and if I'm there he'll practically ignore me. He'll request almost everything from her. If we're out he will mostly refuse to hold my hand and hold onto her. He wanter HER to read the books, HER to play with HER to talk to, if she's talking to me he starts jumping all over her to get her attention.
I won't lie, it's driving me crazy. I'm pretty jealous. I mean I play with him, talk to him, get him changed, spend time with him. I do tons of things with him but as soon as she walks through the door it's like I'm invisible.
It also doesn't help that when she's busy or when she wants him to leave her alone for w/e reason instead of just handling it or getting him insterested in something else she gets frustrated and tells ME to get him away from her, so then I have to deal with the screaming child. I feel like it makes him dislike me even more because now I'm the one responsible for taking him away from his favourite. When we're at the mall and he's holding my hand and goes to take hers she just lets him. I feel like she should tell him to hold my hand instead. She KNOWS he favours her over me and pretends like he doesn't when he obviously does. She's just like oh it's fine, he likes you as much when you're not here and it's like no he doesn't.
I also find that I'll be doing something with him, like trying to get him changed or something, and he'll throw a fit and if I get frustrated and walk away for a bit suddenly she's over there saying 'what happened, are you ok, were you supposed to do that' etc etc, and ends up giving him a hug being the good guy. She'll give him a 'time-out' and either I end up enforcing it or she doesn't enforce it at all and just waits till he finishes freaking out and getting him to do something totally different to make up for whatever it was he was doing.
She doesn't do anything major so it's hard when I try to talk to her and she's just like well what was I supposed to do? Sometimes she enforces things great and for other things she lets it go where I wouldn't and ends up looking like the good person. The problem is it's subtle not blatent like I tend to hear in other peoples situations.
I'm just getting really frustrated always being second best and having her step in and be the good person. I try to get my son changed and he throws a fit and she comes over and suddenly he's fine. So she's good I'm bad.
I spend all day with him doing stuff and she walks through the door and I'm invisible and he doesn't want to talk to me or do anything with me. She wants him to leave her alone and I'M the one responsible for ripping the screaming attached child from her making me look even worse than usual. I'm just so sick of it and I want my child to like me not my mom.
I also want her to deal with him on her own without involving me and making it so I'm the one who has to take him away. I try to talk to her about some things and I feel like she's laughing at me or thinks I'm unreasonable. I told her, tell him to hold my hand and she just acts like I'm crazy. She KNOWS he likes her mom why can't she try to get him to like me? I just hate it.