my son is out of control

Jme - posted on 11/14/2013 ( 3 moms have responded )

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I'm at my wits end with my 5 year old son. I love him dearly but he drives me crazy! He doesn't listen very well unless we sit say it 10x's.iv tried grounding him, taking things away, timeouts, spanking( not hard). He take thing away from his little sister and when she doesn't to him he throws a tantrum like 2 year old. He talks back l, he calls names to ppl when he don't get his way. I don't know what to please an advise, would be great.

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Kathy - posted on 11/14/2013

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Well, there is your clue: He has less problems at school than at home, thus he has the ability to follow rules and understand consequences. If you get out of control by yelling or otherwise losing control, it is a game he has won. Stand your ground and if he does not stay in timeout, calmly put him back. Set the timer over again if he makes a noise or talks back. You may need to get help demonstrated from an expert that you can sometimes get from parenting centers. When he does not listen to you it means he does not take you seriously or expect a consistent reaction or control on your part. A child will accept your yelling if he knows that ultimately he will get what he wants and be in control of the situation.

Jme - posted on 11/14/2013

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I agreed rules are set he just won't listen, or anything else he seems to me at a 2year old level for the way he responds to stuff like that. In school he's doing good with rules some slip ups bit mainly good. But at home its deff not like this he is deff out of control. I don't like after I yell and punish him makes me feel bad BC he got me to that point but I can't just walk away and come back he forgets what he just did. U ask him what u just said he sometimes repeats back what u said other he has no idea what I said or why he's being punished and to top it off he'll go back and do it again that day or the next..nothing seems to stick in his mind least at home

Kathy - posted on 11/14/2013

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My! You should not have to repeat things. He shouyld have an immediate consequence and you need to stand your ground. Have the rules in plain view and be consistent, then there is no room for argument. Just say, "That's the rule," stick to your guns and do not accept discussion. You are the adult. Don't argue and don't give in because he gets upset. If you need this modeled for you, you can go to your local Family Road or family services for advice and assistance in setting up rules and how to enforce them. Teachers are often a great resource as well. I don't believe in children running the household.

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