my son of 10 lost his father to death.

Lauren - posted on 03/01/2015 ( 5 moms have responded )

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my son of 10 was very close to his father even though we were divorced. He adapts very well to his step dad. the two dads were very understanding. my son is ok at times but he gets a temper sometimes and last night he ran to me holding me so tight cos he claims he saw his father in heaven. how do we deal with this.

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Jodi - posted on 03/02/2015

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I disagree with only following up on the grief counsellor. Yes, he needs a grief counsellor, but also the school counsellor will be good because it provides your son with one other person at school that he feels he can comfortably go to if he is feeling overwhelmed or needs some support.

Renee - posted on 03/01/2015

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Definitely follow up with a specific GRIEF Counselor, but also acknowledge that his father will ALWAYS be with him and love him and it's okay if he "sees his father in heaven". It can be very comforting. He does need to talk to a grief counselor but you ALL should speak with one together so he knows he's not alone in missing his dad and that you are all a family and will work through this together. Anger is natural, but it HAS to be channeled in the proper way. Kids don't always have the words to explain their feelings but drawing or running or just talking about the good times and memories, it all helps. Acknowledge his pain and tell him how much you hurt too, since you do hurt for him. But let him know his dad lives IN him because he is from him and keep a picture of him next to his bed so he doesn't feel like you want him to forget him. Let him know his dad is very proud of the boy he is and the young man will be. Time, it takes time. I hope this helps.

Lauren - posted on 03/01/2015

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the school said he was on a list and they never got back to me and I didn't follow up cos after that he was fine
we spoke openly to him.

he was hysterical last night and my husband thought he was getting a temper and he said he keeps him big and said we must listen to him
I don't know,i don't want to baby him cos he was bullied also.

what do I do

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