My son refuses to come to me when his grandfather is around

Jyoti - posted on 01/04/2013 ( 4 moms have responded )

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My 4 yr old son doesnt come to me when his grandfather is around. He doesnt want me to feed him or take care of him or sleep with me.
His grandfather allows him to eat chocolates and fruits for breakfast and lunch instead of food. He refuses to go with me to the park as well.
Can somebody pls suggest how I should handle this issue? My son is losing out on nutrition and I am missing out on "US" time with him. My husband says I am making a big deal about nothing and should adjust.

But it really hurts when your child does not listen to you at all and treats you like a stranger. Please help.

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Elfrieda - posted on 01/04/2013

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If you're looking for a firm but non-confrontational way to establish that YOU are the boss, not grandpa, try telling your son (in front of g-pa) "Look at me. Don't look at Gpa, look at me. Now listen to me. Before you get chocolate, you need to eat your toast." And if he's gotten a piece of chocolate already in his hand, have him thank Gpa and then take it from him and put it in your purse for later, telling him when it will be time to eat it. (Maybe at the park?)

Elfrieda - posted on 01/04/2013

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This is how my son is with my dad, too. He loooooves him! I think it's great and only step in to enforce potty time, naptime, etc. If I'm there, grandpa's not in charge of what he eats, I put my foot down about that. But when I'm not... well, eating many cookies is part of the fun of staying with grandpa and grandma. I just don't ask! But they are only together for a short while a couple of times per week. Does his grandfather live with you?

Michelle - posted on 01/04/2013

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Tell the Grandfather the rules you are bringing up your son by and you would appreciate if he followed then as well.

If that doesn't work then you need to limit the amount of time around Granddad.

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