My son wants my ex and his wife to come to my home for my son's birthday..

Amber - posted on 08/12/2012 ( 6 moms have responded )

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My son's 9th birthday is in 2 weeks and he wants to have a bbq/sleepover with his friends at my home. He wants to have his dad and his wife come over as well. In the past we've always done the parties at public places (swim parks, pizza. etc.) so we've both attended. My ex and I get along ok but I struggle with his wife. They don't contribute financially to the kids although they have them half the time. I really want to be the bigger person and give my son what he wants, but it is very uncomfortable to think of having them in my home. I need some advice!!

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Jodi - posted on 08/13/2012

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Can you just agree to perhaps invite them over for cake time? The chances are they may be just as uncomfortable about this as you are, so this could be a reasonable compromise.

Katherine - posted on 08/12/2012

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You are right to feel uncomfortable. I would too. But you can also be the bigger person and allow it for one day for your son. They won't make a scene or anything will they? Or argue? If they do then definitely DON'T invite them. If they are respectful I would just do it. I know it's got to be hard. My ex and I have separate parties for the kids. We are newly separated though.



Anyways, I say go for it.

Dove - posted on 08/12/2012

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I couldn't do it. I couldn't even consider it. IF, however, you and your ex get along alright and you don't think either of them would cause a scene.... go ahead and give it a shot. Focus on your son and his friends and just pray for the minute they walk out the door.

OR.... you could talk to your son about his father and wife possibly taking him out the day before or the day after if the thought of them in your house is too much to bear.

I won't ever have my ex or his wife set foot in my home, but there is a LOT of history there and none of it is pretty.

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Amber - posted on 08/21/2012

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So we went ahead and invited dad. Then come to find out My parents, and sister are unable to come.. His parents and brother are coming.. Do you think it would be wrong to invite a couple of our friends so that my husband and I have adults to talk too?? I feel like this is going to be extremely awkward!

Kristin - posted on 08/13/2012

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My husband and I have a party for my step kids witch his side of the family. When they go to their moms, she has a party for them with their friends and her side of the family.we have them the same amount of time that their mother does. My husband sways every year that he doesn't understand why that they just don't have one party for each kid together.

[deleted account]

i have friends that have been in similar situations. they always have separate parties for their children. Its been explained to the kids that its best that the adults get to spoil them in their own ways. no child will argue with double the fun.

Personally im not sure if i could do it, if its awkward with the ex's wife the child will pick up on it n no child should have that on their birthday.

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