My soon to be ex doesn't want my oldest child, but will take our youngest all the time.

Elisha - posted on 02/11/2013 ( 2 moms have responded )




I met my soon to be ex-husband when my oldest daughter was almost 2. We were together for almost 4 years and she called him daddy and they did a lot together- he loved her as his own. We also had another daughter who is almost 3 now and she is a total daddy's girl. When he left us he would still watch the girls when I would go to work, but now he doesn't want to watch our oldest anymore just our youngest. How do I tell her that daddy doesn't want her anymore, but still wants her sister?


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Dove - posted on 02/11/2013




Does she know that he's not her father? If not... she probably should know. It would've been better for her to be raised with this truth (assuming she hasn't been... if she has, disregard this part), but she does need to know that it is NOTHING she has done.

I am sorry he is doing this to her. He may have no legal obligation to her, but he does have a moral one now. Unfortunately you can't dictate other people's morality.

Planning some special mommy/daughter time when your youngest is with her father might help take the sting off a little.

Holly - posted on 02/11/2013




this is a hard one, but is understandable from his point of view... it's not his kid. he has not attachments to you anymore... and he doesn't HAVE to. you can tell your daughter that SHE gets to do something special when her little sister goes to see her daddy... THIS is one of the MAIN reasons I am always 100% honest with my kids... they call my fiancee whom we live with daddy, but they KNOW that he is not their daddy, and that he IS my step daughter's daddy.

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