Sarah - posted on 06/05/2015 ( no moms have responded yet )
Hi, my daughter turned 13 back in February and recently I've noticed languages and attitudes that are not suitable for her age or inappropriate for any child to be having these behaviors! First of all, I found out that she has been "stalking" a boy in his grade's older brother who is a Grade 11 student at our neighborhood high school on Instagram. He is already revealed to have a girlfriend but my daughter contacted him on Facebook if he's going to her graduation and wrote on a piece of paper that she waited till she was 13 and he was still 16 so she would seem closer to his age! I shut down her social media accounts, taken away online privileges, and explained to her that it is not inappropriate for a 13 y/o to be dating a guy who's four years older, it's not fine with me, and that she needs to leave him alone because he already has a girlfriend and would rather make him feel uncomfortable if she keeps on doing whatever she did. She is a Grade 7 student who will soon be graduating(8-12 is secondary school here). The teacher had a meeting with me saying that my daughter occasionally talks about him and how she's going to "ask him out" to the grad ceremony later on in June because he told her that he'll be there because he has a family member who will also be finishing elementary school. I told her that when the families DO come in, she is required to leave him alone and act mature and appropriately - meaning no "asking out", silly behavior, telling her peers that shes his future girlfriend, and if he is the one who talks to her, show him the normal kind of behavior or her teacher as she told me will have to pull her out of the dance. The teacher AND principal said that they have no choice but to keep an eye of her and if they find any kind of poor attitude or especially actually approaching up to him, they will have to let me know that she will get the certificate but she will NOT be participating in the party like all the other children. I've had a talk with her that she isn't allowed on social media because apparently I didn't know she had Instagram or any of those sites until I checked the computer history and I went through her accounts before talking to her and shutting those accounts down. She also claims that she's doing it because girls are teasing her because she is one of the only students who aren't Asian - our city is really diverse and multicultural. I thought it might be true once and contacted the teacher about bullying and racism, but she said that other kids do not bully her but some tells her to stop it when she follows them around ONLY talking about boys and her obsessions. The girls tried to get her involved during lunch but its really hard since it's all she talks about, and sometimes her topics are WAY off her limits and way too inappropriate! Any ideas? She never acted this way before!!