my TEN YEAR OLD daughter just got asked on her first date? what do i tell her - Yes no?

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Chet - posted on 08/20/2013

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I would ask her what she thinks a date is. The 10 year old definition of what a boyfriend is or what a date is may not be at all the same as yours. Don't assume that she's imagining dinner, a movie and dancing at the all ages club. She may think your family is just going to let some kid tag along when you go bowling. I remember when one of my cousins was in grade four she had a boyfriend. In her social circle, your boyfriend was the boy in the class you talked to on the computer (as compared with only talking to the girls in the class). Now, if my 10 year old wants to have an age appropriate interaction with a ten year old boy, and if that's what 10 year olds call having a boyfriend, I'm okay with that. So long story short, I would ask her she's imagining for this "date" and then talk to her about whether THAT is okay or not. Similarly, I don't believe in banning kids from boyfriends until a magic age. I believe in age appropriate interaction between boys and girls, and they can call it what they want.

Jacqueline - posted on 08/22/2013

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What is a date at 10 years old. I remember the first boy I went on date with at 10, we went fishing, I thought it was cool, and thats all we did. I understand that today a date could mean almost anything. So a supervised playdate at your house would work for me. Otherwise, way to young to go to the movies or be unsupervised on a date. Let's first qualify what "date" means for a 10 year old.

Firebird - posted on 08/17/2013

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How is this a question? No ten year old needs to start dating.

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Kathy - posted on 06/19/2014

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I would ask her if she even likes this boy and I think that if she believes that the would be in a healthy relationship them she can date but if she's worried something might go wrong hold it off 1 or 2 years

User - posted on 08/23/2013

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at ten years old??? Absolutely Not! Way way way too young for that. I would personally make her wait until 16. Even at 16 they try to take advantage, but even younger they just arnt emotionally ready, nor are they fully knowledgable about relationships. Has she even gone through puberty? Having to ask that question should tell you the answer

Morganne - posted on 08/22/2013

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As a lot of other women have stated, It is entirely how she perceives a date at this age. If it is an extra kid that tags along to the movies or bowling with the rest of the family, I see nothing wrong with it. But that is all I would do. I personally wouldn't do an unsupervised "date". But again that is just my personal opinion! And what ever you choose is entirely up to you!

Michelle - posted on 08/21/2013

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No way! She's only ten. You should tell her that she's to young and live young while she can. I suggest she date at the age of 14,15 or 16. I don't think she should date at the age of ten.

Carmen - posted on 08/21/2013

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12 years old to go on a date wirh a boy is just too young it does not matter ,what she think ,a date is .who is the parent if don'r do something have change her mind GOD FOR BID she becomes a parent her self young age.

Kristi - posted on 08/20/2013

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Hi Katherine....This is a heated topic:) I am just here to help and suggest some ideas thru my experiences and not to belittle your parenting. We as moms, need to help and support her. Let me know what happens:)

Kelly - posted on 08/20/2013

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you can't possibly be serious. I don't care if you say the kid wont listen..there is no such thing with a 10 yr old! She isn't even remotely able to make any decision such as this. i can't even believe a mom doesn't know how to respond and needs to ask if she should say yes or no. If you do not take control and actually PARENT this child by telling her no...you are going to have much bigger problems soon....VERY soon! Please...take control. Your daughter will thank you one day, believe it or not

Kristi - posted on 08/19/2013

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We need to remind ourselves that WE are the adults, the parents who run the show, not the kids. Its sad to see that many kids are allowed to be disrespectful and not listen to their parents....other than this, you, the parent, are in control of what they do, where they go, what they wear...its your power until they literally turn 18 or choose to move out if they do not want to follow the rules of the home. We are to stand up, be strong, set the boundaries and be firm...No is No! Its not "maybe" or making up excuses.....with that said, many parents feel that they need to explain to their children why they are saying NO. In my opinion, you do not owe them any explanations. Again, set boundaries, say No and mean what you say. You may get a lot of resistance from them, though be strong in your position for you are the parent. Good Luck

Elishia - posted on 08/19/2013

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My ten year old wont lisen what do i do and i have a 14 month year old please help

Kristi - posted on 08/19/2013

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The answer is NO! Until she is 16 yrs old! Kids are doing things very young these days....instead of her focus being on boys, dating, kissing and all the emotional stuff that goes along with that, and peer pressure, her focus is to be on being a 10 yr old, riding her bike, learning and going to school, sports and how to be a respectful young lady that she is. Now, at 15, perhaps doing groups things with young men is okay....as long as there is parent visual and transportation to place. Good luck! I hope I am not too old fashion, though my daughter is 13 and got asked when she was 12! She now tells the boys, "Ask me again when I turn 16! Until then, the answer is and will be NO!"
Let me know what happens:) Good luck!

Kristi - posted on 08/19/2013

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By who, a pedophile? What kind of 10 year olds are you dealing with? Apparently, you missed the day when common sense was being handed out and then fell asleep through the entire section on age appropriate behaviors and adolescence.

I apologize for my sarcasm, I meant to say, I agree with the other moms.

Ev - posted on 08/17/2013

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Ten year old having a date? I don't think so. What does a 10 year old know about relationships in the dating world? None. They are still such a child yet. Do not let her grow up so fast! She should still be interested in girly things not boys!

Dove - posted on 08/17/2013

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At 10 years old? I'd look at her like she's lost her mind. No 10 year old should be dating. Period.

If she'd like to invite a couple of friends to go to a movie or something under adult supervision... I'd consider it, but a 'date' or one on one interaction with a boy... that's not happening in this house under 16.

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