Nap/Bed time weaning help?

Brielle - posted on 09/19/2012 ( 10 moms have responded )

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My daughter is 19 months old and nursed out for both nap time and bed time and is the only time she is bf anymore. I've tried weaning her once before with just giving up naptimes and just rocked with her in our glidder but she would scream, cry and fight with us. My husband can't put her down she just simply will not go to sleep with him, she is all mommy girl and always has been. It lasted about a month of trying just rocking her to sleep but after a month of no progress I got tired of the everyday battle and caved in. My husband and I have baby fever and would like to try for baby number 2 in January but I want DD weaned first. I could definently use some help! What am I not doing right? That month of trying to wean her just off nap time nursings was aweful and like I mentioned before there was no progress it never got easier and she fought just as hard everyday at naptime. Now she has 7 teeth coming in at the same time and when I nurse her for either nap or bed time she falls asleep in my arms but as soon as I get up to put her in her crib she starts crying. I let her cry it out but its just becoming a disaster. How can I make this easier for her?

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Penny - posted on 09/20/2012

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Like Anne, I BF through first trimester of second pregnancy as my first was stil only just 1. It got very tiring and I think I started to dry up, as my daughter started to demand more and more. When I had had enough, I just told her no more. She eventually got it. I never left her to cry it out. I always kept her right by my side to comfort her while she was getting over the loss of her greatest comfort. It was hard at first and my husband slept in another bed some nights, but once she got over it, that was it, and she's never asked to BF again now that I'm feeding her sister, like I hear some kids do. My doctor did mention that BF may cause miscarriage as the uterus contracts, but there is not much research to support this. Food for thought...

Erin - posted on 09/20/2012

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I agree with Anne don't stop a good thing keep BF. I know lots of moms who nursed while pregnant and even tandem BF. As for naps I'm not certain. I struggle with it myself...

Anne Gillespie - posted on 09/20/2012

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It really sounds like she is just not ready to wean yet...and why mess with a good thing?;) As far as weaning before getting pregnant, it's not necessary. 3 of my kids happily nursed into my next pregnancy and weaned effortlessly and painlessly about the end of the first trimester. I think I kind of dried up then. It wasn't always the most convenient thing to be doing, but many times sitting down and getting a dose of feel good hormones was just what I needed!

Kudos to you for nursing well past the cultural norm, keep listening to your baby girl - she knows what she needs!

I hope you find a solution that works for both of you:)

Brielle - posted on 09/19/2012

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I got lucky I guess with that my daughter didn't ever use a binky so I never have to worry about getting rid of that and she never used a bottle so it's not like I can offer that. I just feel stuck! I hate having her cry it out but I might have to suck it up and have her do it that way unfortunantly :( I feel like there really isn't much other optio

Dove - posted on 09/19/2012

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Totally makes sense. I did start gently night weaning my son at that age by telling him every night that he was a big boy and didn't need to nurse again before morning (he was up 1-5 times/night). It didn't 'stick' til he was 2 though and he didn't day wean til 3.... He was my only 'booby addict' cuz my others were 'binky addicts', so weaning THEM from breastfeeding was easy. lol

Brielle - posted on 09/19/2012

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Vicki-No we can't move her from the walls she already has a small room it would be impossible to move her crib and still be able to get around the room and it doesn't help its a weird shape. She used to have a bigger room but my BIL moved in when he had no where else to go so we switched her old nursery into his room and gave her the smaller one. And I don't get her out of respect for my neighbors I could careless what they think about my parenting their 6 kids are constantly pounding on the walls as well soI don't understand why its such a big deal when my daughter does it. I'm not a fan of the cry it out method and letting her cry for an hour without any comfort is plenty IMO. Plus we already tried it for a month previously and there was absolutely no improvement of her crying it out in her crib at naptime. She just gets angry and starts screaming and I did that for a whole month no interuptions before I caved.

Dove-I love BF it makes me super sad to think about giving it up but my husband and I really would love to add another baby to our family we had originally planned to have at least 2 years between each kid but hopefully not 3 but if it worked out that way than it works out that way. We've been having baby fever ever since I was in the hospital with our first baby and I just couldn't wait to have more. BF wouldn't exactly be easy pregnant with a belly coming in and I think I'll be tired enough with that than having to struggle with DD and hormones at the same time I just a trying to see how I can do this smoothly before we decide we want to go ahead and try for #2

Dove - posted on 09/19/2012

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I'm no help cuz I'd just keep nursing her. ;) My heart breaks when my children cry for me (totally different cry than a 'tantrum'... those I can deal with no problem) and I couldn't/wouldn't leave her to cry.



Good luck!

Vicki - posted on 09/19/2012

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kids are smart they know what they gotta do to get a parent to cave. I know you have neighbours and are trying to be respectful to them but is it possible to explain to your neighbours what is going on? Is it possible to move her crib from the walls? When i was weening my son i would go in with a sippy cup and of course it wasnt what he wanted and would push it away so i said ok you dont want it its bed time then and lay him back down and leave. let her cry it out, when she gets the hint that your not gonnea go in she will stop this may take a few days oup to 14 days but im sure she will stop.

Brielle - posted on 09/19/2012

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I live in a duplex townhome and I can hear her pounding on the crib railing while I'm downstairs and my neighbors have complained about hearing her slapping the walls. I've let her go for as long as an hour only because there would be moments of quiet but they don't last long I wanna say 3 minutes tops of no screaming or crying. And when I go in to comfort her which usually leads to nursing her and rocking again she's out within a few minutes. I've even tried rocking her until she's completely out (limp arms, heavy breathing, etc) And still the moment I sit up no matter how softly or quietly I do it, the second her head hits the mattress she's a screaming baby again.

Vicki - posted on 09/19/2012

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When you put her down to cry it out wh yis it a disaster? How long is she crying for before you go and console her?

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