need advice..please

Tina - posted on 01/25/2016 ( 8 moms have responded )

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in August i was awarded temporary full custody of my 2 kids! Their father has beaten my son,(dcfs has been notified), he has a girlfriend who is a felon, he foreclosed on the marital home, has resorted to keeping my kids from me ( pressed charges against him), he has went after my son again and grabs my daughter leaving bruises. He isnow suing me for custody but he refused the home study and now wants a guardian ad litem in which we refused! what should i expect from this now??

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Dove - posted on 01/26/2016

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I'm sure the lawyer has already told you, but make SURE you document everything... names, dates, times, events... every detail you can about what he is doing and has done to the kids.

Listen to your lawyer... and try to breathe. Good luck!

Also... a counselor might be beneficial to your kids (if they aren't seeing one already). Preferably one that is willing to testify in court, but even if not I'm sure your kids could benefit from the extra support.

Jodi - posted on 01/26/2016

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OK, well if you have a lawyer who advised you to refuse, that's different. If you'd mentioned that in your OP, you may have received different feedback.....

Stick to your lawyer's advice and hang in there. There are no guarantees, but I wish you well.

Raye - posted on 01/26/2016

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If you have a lawyer, and are taking their advice, then they should be able to let you know what comes next. It's stressful to go through this, for you and the kids. I wish you the best.

Tina - posted on 01/26/2016

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Ladies, I didn't refuse the GAL actually, my attorney said there is no need for one and they are very expensive. He said that it would be a waste of money , because he knows how the judge will rule in this case.This is why I am confused. Left up to me they wouldn't see him at all. My 12 year old gets to speak to the judge ....I am overwhelmed

Jodi - posted on 01/25/2016

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I have the same question as the others. Why did you refuse a GAL? A GAL is appointed for the benefit of the children, solely to represent them. If it is not in the children's best interests to be around their father and his girlfriend, the GAL will support your petition of full custody or may support a push for supervised visitation only.

Raye - posted on 01/25/2016

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Why did you refuse the GAL? A guardian ad litem usually acts as a fact-finder for the court so the judge can rule in the best interest of the child(ren). They don't actually take over guardianship of the children. Sounds like you should consult with a lawyer.

If you have evidence of abuse from the father, then it should be pretty clear to the judge that custody should remain with you. The father may still get visitation, but you should ask that it be supervised by an impartial 3rd party. Whatever the court decides, you have to abide by. You can appeal to try to get the orders changed, but you usually have to have new evidence to submit to change the ruling.

Sarah - posted on 01/25/2016

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Why would you refuse a guardian ad litum? How does that benefit you or your kids? I am actually not positive you even have to give consent, a judge may simply appoint one on the kids behalf. If he was physically harmed the children and DCFS is involved, there will certainly be a safety plan in place to protect the kids.

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