Need help with my 5yr old who is really mean

Laura - posted on 12/27/2011 ( 2 moms have responded )

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I have a 5 yr old daughter who is extremly strong willed and very mean. Everything she does has to be a challenge from brushing teeth and hair, getting dressed, putting socks on, deciding what to wear. We allow her to do things on her own and if she needs help she will yell at us to do it now. I am at my wits end - she is pulling the fun out of having children. What is so rewarding about a child who is constantly screaming, yelling and getting upset at you. I have tried the time outs, taking things away, not going somewhere, talking to her, trying to help her etc.....NOTHING works. There has been no big changes in our house so there is nothing to put blame on it. I also have an 8 yr old son who the complete opposite of her. I cannot deal with this anymore - I need some help and suggestions. PLEASE i am desperate......

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Eleanor - posted on 12/28/2011

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Rules can work you must persist, In the Uk a PPP or triple P course would help you. I don't know if you are in the Uk or America but can probable find a Positive Parenting Program there and it really helped me and my husband with the same issues and now the issues are barely there! It comes with time thoughm don't expect your child to change overnight! Good Luck!

Dawn - posted on 12/27/2011

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Hum, What are her rules in the house? Have her give you a list of things (guides by you) what would be acceptable and give her double her age in time outs. I have 5, my children came up with these rules (written out initially) 1. Love and appreciate other, 2. Love and appreciate yourself. 3. Safety ALWAYS. 4. Kindness ALWAYS. There is constant clarity on these rules and when broken they serve time facing the corner, in order for them to come out they must NOT TALK and state which rule they broke, ask for forgiveness and what in the future they will to make this NEVER happen again. There is a constant reminder of these rules and when YOU are the parent these rules are much easier. Remind her that SHE is the one who made these rules and it is HER that broke them. This way it takes the pressure off you. Children test us ALWAYS thats what keeps them in check with your feeling. Keeping one step ahead of the game is your best option not only not but in the future! All the best:)

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