need some help here, father custody issues

Rachel - posted on 01/04/2011 ( 7 moms have responded )




a friend of mine is a single father, depressed as he cannot see his daughter he has never hurt his ex or given any reason for her to be angry a him they lived together up until she gave birth she lived with his family where his mother helped her get her liscence and essentiasls for baby, never paid rent ust contribution on food & bills never argued with anyone but as of her giving birth she took sole custody and moved back into her parents home, but in the past her and her mother never got along and were constantly fighting she was desperate to leave home so he had let her live there and was soon pregnant, my friend works a normal 9-5 job to support his new family and eventually buy theyre own home to lie in rather pay the high rates in rent. now she is living at home she decides when he can see his daughter usually once a week for a few hours on christmas day was for one hour but wil not let him take her to ee his side of the family his family is yet to met his 4 month old daughter, is this normal? why would she have changed so much so soon when everything was good prior to her having her baby ? what actions can he do to see his daughter more he is tinking of taking leal actionbut doesnt know who to ask and where to start can someone please help me out with this, he is a great guy and a loving father i dont believe ive met someone who thinks so much of his child before the storys he tells me brings tears to my eyes and i want to help but dont know what to do and if he has to go through courts what actions need to be taken please help


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♥TIA♥ - posted on 01/05/2011




I know it's a difficult situation, I have been helping my cousin gain custody since the mother lived a life of lies as if he never existed in her and the babies life. So before she tries to leave the state like she says she will, with the child and not letting him know. I pray all goes well. As for you, just hang in there. It is not a easy thing to go through.

Amanda - posted on 01/04/2011




He needs to document everything to start. Hire a lawyer and tell the lawyer he wants joint managing conservatorship. Then he will go to court to for a standard possession order. Unless he wants sole custody then he will have to prove her unfit. I hope this is helpful to you.

[deleted account]

Is the baby breastfed? Is it possible the mother is suffering post-partum depression? Not that either of those things makes it right that he can't see his baby, but trying to figure out where she is coming from and trying more to work w/ her MIGHT be more productive than letting a judge decide who gets the baby and when.

How did she 'take' sole custody? If he's on the birth certificate and there is no court order already in place.... they both currently have equal rights to that child.

Definitely tell him to seek a lawyer for advice, but as someone who has been in the court system for almost 3 years now... it is MUCH better if the parents can work out an agreement together and then just get it notarized by the courts to make it legal.

Diana - posted on 01/04/2011




If he the bio father, he needs to get a lawyer. The courts will decide what/when/where/how/etc., if she is being unreasonable.

Rose - posted on 01/04/2011




If the parties can't agree on something. He will have to get a lawyer. That doesn't always work out how you like, but it would put down rules that she has to follow, like more time with daddy and his family. Letters always help. Tell him to go for custody than negotiate from there. I wish all parties involved good luck.

Savannah - posted on 01/04/2011




As the saying always goes he who files first get the child untill hearing. Thats the best way so she can't F*** him. In Kansas he who files first gets it all till the hearing no matter if its the father or not. And letters from friends and family can help him out

Tracy - posted on 01/04/2011




He needs to get a lawyer. I'm not sure where you are, but in most states there are agencies that help people with legal aide. He needs to get a custody/visitation agreement along with child support ON PAPER. That way, if she continues denying him access he has legal recourse. In some states, continued refusal to follow the set agreement can result in a change in custody. Good luck!

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