Samantha - posted on 12/28/2014 ( 8 moms have responded )
I am a new mom of 5 month old baby boy! I am 25 years old (dad just turned 21- not here to get into THAT predicament) and would like some advice on custody. Dad and I were split up when I found out I was pregnant, he told me up and down that he *couldn't * have a baby, he was "too young". Well, we later tried to work it out. I moved to an apartment by myself, towards the end of my pregnancy we were inthe works of having him added to my lease when I found out he started seeing his ex. I called it off and here starts the predicament. From the day my son was born, his father only saw him a handful of times. He made excuses as to why he couldn't (I lived too far away, he worked late, etc) so I stopped putting the offer out there for him to visit. He moved into a house of his own 2 months later (even farther away). He had 3 roommates (all just recently turned 21) move in with him as well. One of those roommates being his new girlfriend. He has yet to help me at all with child support, although we do finally have a hearing next month. Throughout my maternity leave he called me a bum (I only took 6 weeks) and I was close to bring evicted. He has also sent me harassing text messages about seeing our son. Here is my issue, there is 4 young adults living in his house (at first he wasn't even going to tell me who they were). And he still has not allowed me to know where he lives. He says it is none of my business. He is a heavy drinker, so I know there are a lot of parties going on, and he also has a UDD. Needless to say, I have not allowed him to take our son. If he wants to see him, he can do so when I am there. Another bit of information, I breastfeed. I have been more than compliant with him, I brought our son to his mother's for Christmas. I brought him up to his cabin in the summer, etc. But we have hit a wall. He seems go think he will get 50/50 custody, and that I will have no say in the matter. Essentially, I do not trust him with our son, as he has proven that his priorities are not in order right now. He has no experience with children (he didnt even know you cant leave them in the car when you exit) and seems to think he will also be granted overnights. Has anyone gone through a similar situation? And what resources do I need to protect our son?