Newborn sleeping arrangements

Erin - posted on 02/03/2009 ( 60 moms have responded )

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Hi,
I'm a first time mom (creating my baby registry) who is wondering if it is safe to place a newborn into a crib to sleep. I have a tiny house, so the crib will be right next to my side of the bed. I just don't see the reasoning in purchasing a bassinette that I can only use for a few months, only to turn around and buy a crib 3-6 months later.
I have heard from a birthing coach that you should sleep with your newborn in your bed for the first few weeks, but I have also read that can be extremely dangerous for the baby.
Any words of wisdom?
Thank you,
Erin Taylor

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Monica - posted on 04/05/2011

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My husband bought a Snuggle Nest when our son was a few days old because he couldn't stand not being able to roll over and see him between us. Then he slept in a Pack N Play (I bought a mattress that fit) first on the high level and then on the low but right next to our bed until he outgrew it. Now he sleeps in his crib in our room but I still use the Angel Monitor to monitor motion and got Wonder Bumpers which sip onto each individual rail that are much safer than traditional bumpers.

Sharon - posted on 04/06/2011

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Hi Erin, We didn't go for a bassinette for any of our girls, now 3,5 and 7. They came home from hospital and went straight into their cot. I had the cot matress at the high level as recommended, but as you say they are up a lot, I left the side rail down (not really a good thing I know). We had their cot in their own room, so they didn't shre a room with us at all. Have you thought about hiring a bassinette if you really want to get one?

Elizabeth - posted on 02/05/2009

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Hello Erin,

We used a snuggle nest, I am pretty sure that is what you call it. I can be purchased at Target and babies r us, not sure where else. It is not as expensive as a bassinet, I believe it is like $30.00 or maybe craigslist or ebay. We put that right in the middle of the crib and the baby had his own little secure area.. This item is also rugged and sturdy enough that you can put it in bed with you. It comes with a little padding with cover that you can wash and mine had a little night light on top that you could push "on" to check on the baby. I worked beautifully. Good luck.. P.S. I am a big advocate of swaddling, my son did great with that.

Kelly - posted on 02/03/2009

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Hi there.  My Daughter was 8 weeks premature, and when she came home from the hospital 3 weeks later, we put her in her crib to sleep during the day.  She had no issues at all.  As long as you have nothing in the crib with the baby, you are ok.  The only thing we did was swaddle her since she was so used to that in the NICU and it really helped her sleep better.  By having her take naps during the day in her crib made the transition from bassinet at night to her crib completely seamless.  She had no adjustment issues.  I am expecting my next baby any day now and I plan to put her into her crib right away as well.



Having your baby sleep in your bed with you is so dangerous and you also will not get any real sleep.  Once the baby comes home, you are going to need to sleep when he/she does. 



Congratulations and best of luck to you!  By the way - it is going to be hard for you to decifer all of the advice you get....just use your instinct and what you are most comfortable with even if it doesnt include my advice!  :) 

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Chantelpaishon - posted on 09/05/2013

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I'm a first time mother to a 2 month old. I have a bassinet and a crib. I tried putting my daughter in the bassinet because until they are 4-5 months old is safer then in a crib due to SIDS. At least that's what other mothers had told me. My daughter would not sleep in her bassinet because it was too hard, she loved my bed. I also had her sleeping in a rocker for the first few weeks, which she loved also. I don't move at all at night and I'm an extremely light sleeper , so any move or noise of hers I was up. It works out best because I can throw her on my boob without getting out of bed also. I've realized my daughter just likes a mattress under her chooses to a hard bassinet. I won't be putting her In her crib until she stays rolling over in her sleep. .... or I'll just put my bed against a wall and kick daddy out of the bed. I wouldn't waste money on a bassinet, but I would get a rocker just incase.

Stifler's - posted on 04/06/2011

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I borrowed a bassinet from friends for both babies so I could give it back when I was finished with it.

Lashanda - posted on 02/05/2009

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I am a mother of 2 girls. I used a bassinet for the first couple of weeks. Yet, if you prefer not to buy one just use the crib. And from listening to friends and other parents once your child starts to sleep in your bed you can never get them out of your bed. Like you said it is dangerous for the baby.

Nicola - posted on 02/05/2009

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Hi, I have an 11 month old daughter and have often had her in bed with myself and my partner. As long as you have not had alcohol it is perfectly safe, although i dont suggest it as i had never one nights good sleep with her in my bed. Whatever is suitable for you. All babies are different as are all mums. Whatever you feel comfortable with will be the right decision. Just go with what feels right for you, if you want to put the baby in a cot just remember not to have covers etc and to have the baby with their feet touching the bottom of the cot.

Christina - posted on 02/05/2009

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Congrats Erin,



My son is a month old and he slept in the bed with me at the hospital and that was it. You and your baby will both sleep better in seperate beds and trust me you and yu will need the sleep. My son sleeps in his crib even though I have a cradle. Its just whatever you and your baby are comfortably with.

Tara - posted on 02/05/2009

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After readin some of the other responces I HAD to chime back in on co-sleeping and crib bumpers.  Easy to follow advice:  If you can hold it tightly over your face and breathe without struggle it was made with your baby's safety in mind!  Many crib bumpers are completely safe if properly installed!  As for the information available on co-sleeping, most moms fall asleep with thier babies at some point and the babies are fine.  I suggest if you wish to look at statistics that you look at the other factors involved in the outcomes.  Was it the mother that rolled?  Usually not.  Was she on medication or drugs, drinking?  Does she have a sleep condition?  Was there other items in the bed?  People?  Honestly, I have only ever heard of one case of an infant being hurt by co-sleeping in my personal life from anyone I've ever known.  In that story the father had been drinking heavily and rolled over without knowing it.



This is one of those decisions that you really do have to make for yourself.  My step mom, the Family practicioner first taught me that statistics and opinions on topics like this don't hold much ground in real life because of too many differing factors in each case.  Just like the sex of your baby; you may not think you know, but deep down you're the only one who does, you don't have to admit it out loud - just follow your heart.



(((((((HUGS)))))))

Tara - posted on 02/05/2009

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Quoting Erin:

Newborn sleeping arrangements

Hi,
I'm a first time mom (creating my baby registry) who is wondering if it is safe to place a newborn into a crib to sleep. I have a tiny house, so the crib will be right next to my side of the bed. I just don't see the reasoning in purchasing a bassinette that I can only use for a few months, only to turn around and buy a crib 3-6 months later.
I have heard from a birthing coach that you should sleep with your newborn in your bed for the first few weeks, but I have also read that can be extremely dangerous for the baby.
Any words of wisdom?
Thank you,
Erin Taylor


 



You're going to get very different answers to this question.  Truth is, event the experts disagree.  I can only give experience based advice.



I never used a bassinette - waste of money.  Playpens, bouncers, and sometimes car seats get slept in for convience sake.  Mine slept with me alot for breast feeding and convience sake.  I didn't have mine sleep by Daddy because he wasn't born with the instinct to not roll and used blankets where I was impartial to covering myself.  We had the crib set up in advance and used it when we could, but to be honest most babies will fall sleep all over the house: the floor, the sofa, your arms, the swing....



There's really no reason why moms shouldn't follow their own best instincts when it comes to their children and families.  Only you know the people in your home and only you can actually view the possible dangers in your home, so only you will know what warnings apply to you.  For example;  co-sleeping can be dangerous because adults are much bigger and may crush / sufficate a baby and bedding can sufficate a baby......I have a bed against a wall where I don't use blankets and sleep propped against the cutioned wall, so these two dangers do not apply here.



In the end you're going to do whatever you and your child are most comfortable with.  I wish you the best of luck and congratulations!



-Tara

[deleted account]

I have to agree with several other posters...DO WHAT YOU FEEL IS BEST FOR YOU AND YOUR BABY. You won't know until you bring the little creature home and really get to know them! We bought a beautiful crib and had it all decorated for my daughter. She is now 2 1/2 and has slept in her crib about 10 times (most of which occured after trying to put her new baby brother in the same crib! I breastfed my daughter and we had quite a bit of trouble at first so my lactation consultant encouraged me to hold her near my bare breasts as often as I could. Needless to say we spent a lot of time in the bed just hanging out! I really didn't forsee myself cosleeping, but after we brought her home it was the natural step for my husband and myself. She still sleeps with us and my 9month old does too. Yes I bought a king sized bed when we found out we were pregnant again and it has paid off! I didn't bother buying a crib for my son or even decorate a nursery since my daughter really thinks her bedroom is a playroom. Good luck with whatever you choose to do. No one parent is right or wrong about crib vs cosleeping...we all just do what feels best for our family. Your mothering instinct will override whatever you think you should be doing because you family or whoever says that is what you should do. Chances are all of your feelings about raising children may change when you finally get to hold the little one! Mine sure did and I wouldn't change the way we care for our children one bit now!

[deleted account]

Lovin the advice received by Skye Davis's dad! I received similar advice when my son was born from my mom and it was the best advice I ever got. I read all the books and thought I knew exactly what to do in every situation. Then the unthinkable happened. My son refused to sleep on back or belly! Gasp I know! Right from day one I had him sleeping right beside me in his pack and play which worked out wonderfully, not only was it ideal at home but when I had to take it with me to someone else's place he was comfortable sleeping in it so nap time was no problem in a strange place. So back to the "anti-back sleeper". I was terrified of him sleeping on his belly because of every piece of literature on SIDS that scares us to death. Then mom handed out her second piece of advice, WE ALL SLEPT ON OUR BELLIES! Back when we were babies the taboo was AGAINST back sleeping. And here we all are! Anyway, my son slept in the pack and play for 4 months, then I dragged the crib in my room and had him sleep in it for a month to get used to it before moving him into his own room next door. The transition was a smooth as a babies bottom! Mind you my son has been a wonderful sleeper right from the start and has been sleeping through the night since 10 weeks! Loving every second of it! So, my advice it try what works for you because only you know what that is. And what you don't know, just listen, your baby will tell you ;) they are good at that! Welcome to mommyhood, enjoy the ride!

Angie - posted on 02/05/2009

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Everyone has offered all the right advice! All I can say is good luck, and enjoy your new arrival!

Allison - posted on 02/05/2009

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Co-sleeping is one fierce debate...people feel as strongly about it one way or another as they do towards whether to spank or not. From my own experience...I too, read much on the subject before the birth of my son and had decided to not co-sleep. Then came my son :) From day one in the hospital, he screamed the moment he was put down. Once we were home he would cry, no, scream, when placed in the bassinette. I was so exhausted and at my wits-end and called my pediatrician. They do not advice crying it out that young (which I have difficulty with any way). A newborn child has distinct needs and cannot understand anything beyond the fact that either their needs are being met..or not. My pediatrician advised to do whatever it took for both me and baby to sleep because it was detrimental to our health. He gave me many tips on how to more safely sleep with my son and said SIDS risks are there no matter what you do and that in cultures all over the globe, co-sleeping is common practice. So, I brought him to bed with me and I do not regret this decision to this day. He sleeps wonderfully and I am accutely aware of him. I have never been a mover in my sleep, and I wake anytime he starts to stir. Bottomline, I had all these ideas that were great in theory until my child actually came. We needed to do what was best for all of us and so far it's working great. I know that I'll know when the time is right to move him to his crib, but for now, we both love having him with us and don't second-guess it for a moment because in the end, it granted all of us, including baby, our sanity back. I hate how people make you feel ashamed or guilty for doing what's right for your family, in this case, sleeping with baby. As long as you're smart about it, it can be safe and a wonderful bonding experience to top it off.



To answer your question, we purchased a pack n' play (Graco), and though he won't sleep in it, it's great for changing (especially in the middle of the night) or for laying him in it to play while you take a shower, etc...



Congratulations to you and I wish you the best :)

Linda - posted on 02/05/2009

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Why is sleeping next to someone a bad habit?
pls don't missunderstand me, I'm not trying t provoce, I'm just curious.

[deleted account]

My husband was too cheap to buy a bassinet for our daughter, and I found no practicality for purchasing something that was around $80-$100 that I'd only use for a couple of months. Our solution? We took one of those $8 ergonomic clothes baskets from walmart and put a very firm memory foam pillow in the bottom of it. That is what our daughter slept in for the first two months of her life! We spent about $20 on materials, and we still use them to this day. She loved it. I was totally against sleeping in the same bed with my child because I didn't want to start her out with a bad habit that I would have to break. She got her own bed from jump, and we have never shared a bed since!

Skye - posted on 02/05/2009

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Quoting Erin:

Newborn sleeping arrangements

Hi,
I'm a first time mom (creating my baby registry) who is wondering if it is safe to place a newborn into a crib to sleep. I have a tiny house, so the crib will be right next to my side of the bed. I just don't see the reasoning in purchasing a bassinette that I can only use for a few months, only to turn around and buy a crib 3-6 months later.
I have heard from a birthing coach that you should sleep with your newborn in your bed for the first few weeks, but I have also read that can be extremely dangerous for the baby.
Any words of wisdom?
Thank you,
Erin Taylor



 



Hi Erin,



My little baby is now 1 year and 9 months and believe me when I say that I was terrified of which way to put my baby when she sleeps.  I got given a second hand basinet that was about the size of the one they have in the hospital and she slept in that till she was around 7 months old.  They are fantastic and I kept her right in my room as her room was too far down the hall.  Due to me breast feeding, I used to pull her into bed with me in the morning and feed and go back to sleep.  It is the only way i got any sleep.  My dad once said to me "They are not as fragile as you may think", I didn't believe him and now I agree.  They will tell you when your not looking after them and at the age of 1 year and 9 months my daughter bought me the nappy and the wipes so I can change her bum.  They really do learn to lead you.  You will be a great mum because you care enough to ask the questions!  Good luck :)



Skye





 

Linda - posted on 02/05/2009

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I must agree with Kim Sokoloski. Co sleeping is getting a bad reputation for no good reason. Read up on it and see, it is very safe if done properly. I have Co slept with both my children and still do. my 2 year old sleeps in her own bed now but comes in to us when she wants to which is rare but welcome. Our little one still Co-sleeps mostly. they sleep much better, don't cry when they wake up or to fall asleep and I like being close to my babies. It is a short time they are babies and I feel no need for them to "learn" to be alone so early! eventually they will want to and the more closeness and secutity I can provide for them now the more selfsufficient and confident they will be later.

My suggestion is to read up on it, just google it (and check souces! ) in order to make aninformed decision and listen to your baby is telling you she/she wants.

Adrienne - posted on 02/05/2009

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My son slept with me in bed for the first five months. I really enjoyed having him with me and though I worried about him at first, it seemed so very instinctive very quickly. Breastfeeding was so much easier with him. At about five months, he was sleeping through the night and starting to move away from me in his sleep and moving a lot. It was an easy transition for us at that point. Really though it comes down what works for you and your baby. Don't worry about it too much. We didn't have funds to get a bassinette, play pen and crib. So we had to work with what we had. There are a lot of great options out there and everyone is different.

Mary - posted on 02/04/2009

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ps when you are a new mom you wake up for the slightest little thing so sleeping in bed was very safe for us. the research shows that it has been dangerous in homes where the parents drink too much or are really sleep deprived (being a mom of newborn doesnt count! hahaha) or if they fell asleep on the couch or somewhere not planned. in a bed you just make sure no pillows or really fluffy comforters are going to fall on her. its really not as hard as it seems!

Mary - posted on 02/04/2009

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i think its "safe" either way but maybe less convenient for you if she's in a crib because to check on her (which you will a lot!) is more complicated. We used a co-sleeper, and she did grow out of it very quickly but it did come in handy when she had that first cold and we were up all night watching her (the doctor actually said- take turns watching her- she was pretty congested and having trouble breathing). But we really ended up just pulling her into our bed a lot and thats where she slept most of the time because i was constantly jumping up to check her temperature, adjust blankets, etc so it was much easier to have her close where i could reach out and feel her cheeks or nose to see if she was cold (winter baby). i just read an amazing article in mothering magazine on the benefits of bed sharing- im all for it! :) good luck!

[deleted account]

I have 6 kids & we co-slept with all of them. We did have a crib in the room for the first five, but mostly for naps, & sleep before I was ready for bed. Due to our living arrangements, our 6th slept with us until he was well over a year old, & never slept in a crib. You are usually much more aware of your baby when you co-sleep!
Co-sleeping gets a bad rap, but it was a cultural standard for millenia!

Erika - posted on 02/04/2009

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My son is 5 weeks and he mostly sleeps in bed with me. I too live in a small apartment and I set up the crib in my room. He usually starts out there but for those late night feedings I pull him into bed with me and we doze off. It is true, its amazing how aware you are even when you are sleeping. I always make sure he is in a space with none of my blankets or pillow near him though. I find it helps us both fall back asleep after a feeding because I don't have to move him. Plus I just love having him close to me! Good luck, you will find what works best for you and your little one.

Kim - posted on 02/04/2009

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Here's a link to an article citing the AAP's concerns about the advice given in the book Babywise. The advice in it really can be harmful to a baby's development, despite the popularity it has gained over the years. The dangers are outlined in the article...

http://www.ezzo.info/Aney/aneyaap.htm

Courtney - posted on 02/04/2009

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My daughter slept with us till she was 6 months old, then in a crib...but she only slept with us because she was up ALL NIGHT LONG!! I would say that starting in a crib isn't bad, but make sure that there is no blankets, pillows, or stuffed animals in the crib. Only a fitted sheet, and dress him.her warm so they don't need a blanket.

Stacey - posted on 02/04/2009

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Ps. I did end up co sleeping with my daughter ONLY to breastfeed her at night. I used the side lying position. In this position baby is cradled by our arm. I also found that I was acutely aware of my baby at all times (not getting quality sleep LOL). In addition I had a extra firm mattress and I left the comforter off. I was completely against co sleeping but, my daughter was a marathon nurser. She would stay attached for hours (with no relief from a pacifier of any kind). I could not stay awake and the side laying position was safer then falling asleep with her in a chair. Try not to get to discouraged if you change your plans.

Tressa - posted on 02/04/2009

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My son is 7 weeks old and the $ I spent on a bassinette was wasted. He would not sleep in it but a few minutes at a time. With each startle reflex his hand would hit the sides and it would wake him. We co-sleep and I am returning to work on Monday and trying to get him to sleep in his crib....it's okay if he is already asleep but he won't fall asleep in it. I am reading a really good book on all of this right now "BABY WISE". Good Luck!!!!

Stacey - posted on 02/04/2009

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It should be safe, crib bumpers are a no no, try to find a breathable one if you are worried about baby’s appendages getting caught between the rails.

Amanda - posted on 02/04/2009

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i have three kids ranging from 1yr to 9yrs the only time they came into our bed was in night time feeds then they where returned to there bed...There is no way in the world i would have them sleep with us as a baby as hubby is a really deep sleeper and he dont feel or hear nothing once he is asleep...and honestly if u have had a hard long day urself u need a decent sleep i found once during the day when i tryed it i didnt rest at all as i was too aware that bubs was there....Another reason i was put off this type of sleeping arrangementwas after i had my first a girlfriends daughter had her first child her and bubs came for a visit this is what resulted...bubs had been very unsettled most of the night from his first long trip mum was getting very tried and refused help from her mother, after a few hours of trying to settle him total with no luick she decided to place him in her bed and let him cuddle up that way. Yes this did work and bub and mum both went off to sleep, nanna went to check on them half an hour later and couldnt find the baby, mum had rolled over and some how managed to wrap the blanket and baby partly under her, the baby was totaly wraped up in the blanket mind u...nana quickly rescued the baby and his lips where just starting to turn blue and his breathing was really shallow and almost non existant nanna managed to save the little faller and bring him back. IT was lucky she decided to check on her daughter n granchild other wise this story could have been much worse...the little boy was cleared medically and has never looked back he is a happy healthy boy, but this is a big risk to take. But that is my opinion and everyone has there views. Sorry if i have been direct to the point but i dont see the point of tip toeing around when it comes to the life of our babies.

Megan - posted on 02/04/2009

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Hi Erin.. welcome to to Mother's Club.. :) 





I am a recently new mom myself, I have a 5 month old son. I preferred to use his crib only because I wanted him to get used to sleeping alone as soon as possible. We did use a bassinet for a few months at the beginning just so I could have him close to us. But if the crib is going to be in your room I see no need at all for a bassinet. Just make sure you get a bumper that is breathable incase he rolls or shifts in his sleep.. My son started to roll and shift in his sleep at 2 months. Good luck with everything!



Kim - posted on 02/04/2009

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I just had to chime in one more time!:) Co-sleeping gets such a bad rap, and it is hard for me to understand why that is. I know there's the fear that Mom will roll over onto the baby, but from personal experience, and from the experiences of other co-sleeping moms I know, the most common testament is that you are so acutely aware of your baby next to you, even when you're asleep, that has never happened to me or anyone else I know. This however is not true for Dads or caregivers of babies not their own...it all has to do with the motherly instinct and connection we as moms have to our babies..therefore a baby should not co-sleep with anyone other than his own mother. But as long as you take the proper safety precautions in your bed, there is no safer place for a baby to be! Studies have actually shown co-sleeping to reduce the risk of SIDS. Far more babies die in cribs from SIDs than in the parent's bed. You can Google that for more info. Beyond safety, co-sleeping will result in MORE sleep for both of you, regardless of popular opinion. I co-slept with both of my children and never felt that kind of exhaustion that new parents often complain about. And sleep studies have shown that mothers and babies who sleep together become very attuned to one another's sleep patterns...often waking at the same times during the night. And the mother's heartbeat actually helps to regulate the baby's heartbeat when they sleep together..this is one theory of why the risk of SIDS in lower in co-sleeping babies.

I hate to start a debate and that's not my intention. But after reading so many uniformed opinions on co-sleeping, based primarily on fear and long standing myths, I just felt it was important to clarify things a bit. Ultimately you have to do what feels right to you, regardless of the advice you get. I'm sure getting so many different pieces of advice has left you feeling even more confused than before! I'd just encourage you to investigate the options for yourself and then make your decision. Good luck!!

[deleted account]

The crib is a very safe place to put a newborn as long as you don't put anything in there with him/her (stuffed animals, comforters...).  Co-sleeping can be very dangerous.  When you're sleeping you may roll onto them and not know it.  The thick blankets are also very dangerous.  If you want your baby really close to you they make beds that attach onto your bed so your baby is really close, but not in the bed with you. 

Samara - posted on 02/04/2009

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Get your new baby to sleep in the crib! Just make sur that you have the appropriate side cushion things... i think they call it a 'bummper pad'.... My son is almost 2 and he sleeps in my bed with me.... I had him in a bassinet for his first couple weeks, until he got too long,,,, and had a crib, but 'for convienience' just kept him in bed with me..... AND HE'S STILL THERE..... it's hard to break that "habit".... most of the time he'll go to bed alone at nap times (when Iam at school).... but when I am home, he NEVER goes to bed alone....... SO... my suggestion is..... get baby to sleep to sleep in the crib..... and YES I agree that bassinets are a waste of $$$ :)

Caroline - posted on 02/04/2009

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no no do not sleep with your baby in bed with you. yeah it might be comforting for you and your baby but once you do it your baby will want it all the time, then what time are you and your man going to get together? its perfectly safe to have your baby sleep in a crib i did it with both of mine like you i dint see the point in buying a moses basket. your baby wil be fine and will love the space too.

Kim - posted on 02/04/2009

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There is no good reason that a newborn can't sleep in a crib. As an experienced mother of 3 they all sleep in a crib, in their own room from day one. As long as you have a way to hear them there is no worry. You and your baby will both sleep better.

Pat - posted on 02/04/2009

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When I was pregnant I said from the start I would put my daughter in a bassinet at first then move to a crib. That was the plan and when I brought her home the first night I put her in her bassinet and she woke up every 30 mins crying she did not like it. My boyfriend of course being a man has some super power or at least selective hearing to where he can sleep through her crying me however I can't. I got up and tried to sooth her back to sleep until finally I just put her in bed with me and I can not tell you how much better life has been. I always was afraid that I would roll over on her but to my surprise I actually am more in tune with where she is at all the time and we both sleep much better plus is is WAY easier to breastfeed her when she's in bed with me. I saw that a poster on here said moms who sleep with their babies really don't get much sleep. This is not true in my case. My daughter goes to bed every night at 9 and wakes up at 4 to be fed and then again at 7 when I have to be up. On the weekends we both sleep in until at least 10 she is 10 wks now. I just think that you should do what you feel is best. If we live our lives based on fear of the unlikely, we'll all stay indoors, compulsively cleaning our hands with anti-bacterial cleanser

Lisa - posted on 02/04/2009

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Please don't let anyone scare you about co-sleeping with your baby. If you are planning on breastfeeding it is the easiest thing to do. I used a co-sleeper with my daughter to start with until I went back to work and needed to get more sleep each night so it was hard to stay up with her while she ate and then go back to sleep. I get more sleep when she is sleeping with me. I am very in tune to where she is and have never rolled over on her. We both sleep better at night when together. There are guidelines to safely co-sleeping in a bed together with your baby and to make things safest for your baby, you need to follow them. There are lots of websites where you can find information about it.

If you want your baby in bed with you but are worried about rolling on baby, get a mosses(sp) basket to put the baby in.

A co-sleeper is a great investment instead of getting a bassinet and then a crib. A co-sleeper attaches right to your bed with one side open so you can easily reach your baby and comfort them during the night but gives them their own sleep space. They have ones that later turn into a full playpen and ones that later turn into a full crib. Arms reach is the most popular brand, just do a web search where to find them. I highly recommend one. I was lucky to be able to borrow one. My daughter sleeps in the play pen part now, before she comes into bed with me.

Most hospitals, doctors and nurses will tell you it is unsafe but that is only because that is what they have been taught to say. There is no research out there saying it unsafe. As a matter of fact,in many countries parents and children sleep together until they are school age. The unsafe part comes from hospitals and medical professionals who get money from the baby furniture companies. It is only not safe to sleep with your baby if you are extremely obsese, a drug or alcohol abuser or an extremely deep sleeper.

Good luck and don't let anyone tell you what to do with your baby. Go with your instinct and you will be a great mom.

Erin - posted on 02/03/2009

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Thank you everyone for your great responses! It helps a lot! I appreciate your time. You're all dedicated to other moms, so you must be great mom's too!

Alicia - posted on 02/03/2009

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You have to go with works for you.  I was a single parent from day one, and I too had a small place.  I found that the play pin/bassinett worked wonders.  It is more portable, and surprisingly comfortable for the baby.  I would strongly recommend you not get you or your child used to the co sleeping, because they get used to things very quickly.  Once they get a hold to your "mommy" smell, it will be hard for them to learn to sleep on their own.  Good luck new mom and congratulations!

Julie - posted on 02/03/2009

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Here is what I have found....there are times when your child just will not stop crying unless you are holding them, this gets hard to do when you are so dead tired.  The LeLeche (sorry I know spelling is wrong) League promotes having the child only sleep in bed with you, so I figured couldn't hurt.  I tend to toss and turn when I sleep, however, my daughter occasionally sleeps in bed with me and when she does I am way more aware and do not toss and turn what-so-ever.  Also, on the bumper deal...I heard the whole thing of don't use the bumper, however, because my daughter moves around so much, she would hurt her head several times a night if the bumper wasn't there (she literally pushes herself into the bumper).  You need to take everything with a grain of salt, find out what works best for you and don't go way overboard with the whole things are so dangerous, yeah, things are dangerous and wrong, but how did we survive all the years when all those things were done back then??

[deleted account]

HI!
I am a mother of 2 and have done it both ways. When my daughter was little, I lived in a 1 bedroom apartment, so I had her crib in my room. She slept in it from day one (just make sure you have the bumper pads and nothing else) If I took her into the living room or something, I put her in a playpen. I used a bassinet with my son because we had a bigger house by then, and he had his own room. Honestly, there was no difference. The only thing, for me, was that the bassinet allowed him to be right beside me for the first few weeks. I just had to reach my hand out and he was there. With my daughter, I would have to get up to check on her. I know you don't want to buy a bassinet, but try to find one second hand from a children's consignment shop or something. Having one was very useful and comforting for me. As a first time mom, you may find that you want your baby closer than a crib will allow him/her to be. One final piece of advise: DO NOT SLEEP WITH YOUR BABY IN YOUR BED! I can't stress enough how dangerous that is, not to mention that you and your baby will sleep better if you both have your own space. (and you're not up half the night because you are worried about rolling over on him/her) Hope this helps!

Heather - posted on 02/03/2009

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Again go to the SIDS website to be the safest. I know they sell those bumper things and therefore you would think they are safe however it is not safe to put anything in a newborn's crib!!!

Heather - posted on 02/03/2009

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Quoting Annmarie:

Well I would definitely say no to sleeping in your bed, for 2 reasons, 1 it is extremely dangerous, you hear of parents rolling onto children in the middle of the night all the time. And once they sleep in your bed they will never want to sleep in a crib. My girlfriend has her, her husband and their 2 daughters in her bed every night and she let her girls sleep in her bed from when they were newborns. I have 2 kids and for both my kids a had this thing I bought from toys r us, you can also get it in target or walmart, I think it's called baby bumpers where you put this in the crib and adjust the width to the babies width so that they stay on their side all night.


 

Heather - posted on 02/03/2009

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Let me preface this by saying I am a nurse that works in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit. If you want to be safe go to the SIDS website. Using a crib is fine most mom's just want their baby close and that usually means using a bassinett because it is smaller and fits close to their bed. Just make sure there is nothing in the crib but your baby on a tight fitting sheet. You can swaddle your baby with a recieving blanket, just make sure its not up around the face and always place your baby on their back to sleep.

User - posted on 02/03/2009

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Well I would definitely say no to sleeping in your bed, for 2 reasons, 1 it is extremely dangerous, you hear of parents rolling onto children in the middle of the night all the time. And once they sleep in your bed they will never want to sleep in a crib. My girlfriend has her, her husband and their 2 daughters in her bed every night and she let her girls sleep in her bed from when they were newborns. I have 2 kids and for both my kids a had this thing I bought from toys r us, you can also get it in target or walmart, I think it's called baby bumpers where you put this in the crib and adjust the width to the babies width so that they stay on their side all night.

Char - posted on 02/03/2009

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Co-sleeping is not as dangerous as people in this forum make it out to be.

this is from Dr. Sears' webpage on attachment parenting.
(www.askdrsears.com)
CO-SLEEPING RESEARCH

The physiological effects of sleep-sharing are finally being studied in sleep laboratories that are set up to mimic, as much as possible, the home bedroom. Over the past few years, nearly a million dollars of government research money has been devoted to sleep-sharing research. These studies have all been done on mothers and infants ranging from two to five months in age. Here are the preliminary findings based on mother-infant pairs studied in the sleep-sharing arrangement versus the solitary-sleeping arrangement (Elias 1986, McKenna 1993, Fleming 1994; Mosko 1994):

1. Sleep-sharing pairs showed more synchronous arousals than when sleeping separately. When one member of the pair stirred, coughed, or changed sleeping stages, the other member also changed, often without awakening.

2. Each member of the pair tended to often, but not always, be in the same stage of sleep for longer periods if they slept together.

3. Sleep-sharing babies spent less time in each cycle of deep sleep. Lest mothers worry they will get less deep sleep; preliminary studies showed that sleep-sharing mothers didn't get less total deep sleep.

4. Sleep-sharing infants aroused more often and spent more time breastfeeding than solitary sleepers, yet the sleep-sharing mothers did not report awakening more frequently.

5. Sleep-sharing infants tended to sleep more often on their backs or sides and less often on their tummies, a factor that could itself lower the SIDS risk.

6. A lot of mutual touch and interaction occurs between the sleep-sharers. What one does affects the nighttime behavior of the other.

Even though these studies are being conducted in sleep laboratories instead of the natural home environment, it's likely that within a few years enough mother-infant pairs will be studied to scientifically validate what insightful mothers have long known: something good and healthful occurs when mothers and babies share sleep.

User - posted on 02/03/2009

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Yes it's safe as long as babies head is bigger than the gaps between the bars, I know many people who used a crib only. An often used measure is a coke can if it can fit through the bars dont buy that crib. Sleeping in bed with baby is nice and they're calmer but I don't recommend it in case you roll on them in your sleep. A cheaper bassinette option is a moses basket, I used the carry cot that came with our pram.

User - posted on 02/03/2009

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Putting the crib in your room right away will be fine. But whatever you do, don't put the baby in bed with you, it's very dangerous at any age, especially when they're newborns!

Julie - posted on 02/03/2009

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I have one child right now and I was insistent upon having her in a bassinet, after experiencing that for only 2 months I was thrilled when our bassinnet was recalled and got our money back!  The next child I have will be in a pack and play.  These things are wonderful if you plan to travel overnight and they have bassinnets as an attachment.  This is nice so you don't have to bend over so far to pick up the baby at first, very nice if you have a C-Section!

Char - posted on 02/03/2009

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Look into cosleepers if you're worried about safety.
We had our daughter in our bed for the first 14 months and it was awesome.
It was completely safe, and I felt more secure because she was right beside me.
and...we averaged 6-10 hours a night from 2weeks on because she was in bed beside me

User - posted on 02/03/2009

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My son has also been in a crib in his own room since we came home from the hospital (with a baby monitor - the "old fashioned" kind with sound only..lol). We decided that was the safest for us as we have 2 cats & a puppy. And a small house and also didnt want to spend the money on something he would outgrow so quickly.. (and probably turned out to be a good choice as he HATED the bassinet at the hospital....)

Colleen - posted on 02/03/2009

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Hi...My baby slept in a moses basket in my room for the first 3 nights...after that she slept in her crib.  My doctor said that it was safe just as long as she was placed on her back to sleep.  I agree that there isn't any need to buy a bassinette for your baby...the crib is fine.

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