Monica - posted on 08/31/2016 ( 5 moms have responded )
My oldest Son Mike has just no respect for me! For years I've tried so hard to have him open up to me. When he was young I was in a very abusive relationship with his Father, I then divorced and of course the verbal abuse continued. Then eventually not caring, his father gave up on the bs. I a single mother had no choice to work 2 jobs to support and survive for my son Mike & myself. I realize those precious years were the most important ones ,but again someone had to pay the bills. His father back in 1992 always complaining about child support and how he had to pay it and so on and so on. I never depended on anyone to support me not even the system knowing I was capable of doing it on my own. I now feel guilty in so many ways! I feel guilty that i worked so many hours a week and didn't spend quality time with him for when he was little? I see the difference in both my sons. My youngest of 18 is totally different. when he was born i was able to stay home more and the quality time was definitely there. there 7 years apart and of course i was in a totally different relationship but as the years progressed i became single again. different relationship but it turned out the same in some ways. long story but! I needed to realize the men i was picking was what i really shouldn't of been picking in the first place. live and learn. mean while mike has experienced a divorce and then a break-up after fifteen years with kyle dad. Kyle's dad was very verbal towards mike and so many years I've always protected him of this. shame on me! not enough.. should of left the relationship way before it got out of hand. But I stayed hoping things would of changed and lets just say 15 years was a long time of hopes and prayers. I think back and blame myself for all of this because just maybe my son wouldn't be as he is today. As far as his attitude and his disrespect for me. I've always been by his side, when mike falls mom is right there to make it right! when he's financially strapped or cars needs repairing im there. It can be just about anything and i'm there. he's my life and so isn't my other son. my children are my world.
now as for kyle he's seen just as much if just a bit less drama in my life and doesn't exactly come close to treating with no respect, he sees what his brother does to me and cant stand it. he's even commented to me many times , Mom that's not right,, that kids has borrowed and borrowed and yet name calls you . I tell kyle hes going through some tough times with his choices and raising of his daughter to whom is almost 2. mike has suffered mentally from her mother and cant seem to remove himself from that relationship. I as mom have given him so much advice but yet he doesn't hear me. again i do so much for my son because hes mentally messed up and I did discover he's been taking pills to get through. breaking my heart so bad these days. I cant seem to find the right words to fix his world. so we begin to scream at one another and I tell him I love him but its not enough. There are days and night I suffer on worrying about him and pray I never see anything tragic!! like i said my kids are my world . lost my father at 11 and 35 years and still miss him something terrible. vietnam vet took his life. I realize I'm all over the place in this whole topic situation but im very concerned and confused
Kyle's father has apologized for all the verbal and pain he has caused towards mike for when he was younger . wanted to put that out there. and he has had long talks with kyle's dad and has accepted his apology .
Mike, has said to me on many of occasions he'd be better off gone. for years this has been said.
like i said confused mom asking for advice.