nose peircings and school rules

[deleted account] ( 29 moms have responded )

Hi my 14 year old daughter has her nose pierced but the school now wants her and the rest with them done to remove them as it was a gift last year i don't agree with her taking it out i had mine done and it didn't interfere with my job or learning skills ,please let me know what yous think ,your advice would be very appreciated :)

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[deleted account]

7. Can a school make rules about make-up, hair length, colour and styling, or jewellery and accessories?

Yes, the school can make reasonable rules about wearing make-up, ear or nose rings, hair length, hairstyle and wearing jewellery or accessories at school. A State school’s principal may develop a dress code setting out the standards of what is acceptable in relation to both the clothing worn by students and other aspects of their personal presentation. The school handbook may set out the school policy in regards to this. These rules should apply to both male and female students, and not favour one group of students over another group.

A school can ban you from wearing anything that might be a danger to yourself, other students or staff. Long dangly earrings, spiky rings, or studded belts could cause injury if they accidentally got caught on clothing or came into contact with someone else.

There may be classes or sporting activities where special rules apply. You may have to tie back long hair while operating machines for woodwork, or remove chains or other metal objects while playing contact sports. Similar rules apply to working people, to keep the risk of getting injured at work at a minimum.

A school can make rules about hair length, colour and style or the wearing of make up, provided the rules are reasonable and do not discriminate against a particular group. A school is likely to ban a hair style, make up or a badge that might cause others to be hostile or make fun of you, for example a swastika, green hair or a Mohawk hairstyle.--- But schools should not lay down rigid rules on matters of personal tastes and preference that have nothing to do with your education---

Jodi - posted on 02/05/2014

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Were these always the school rules? Generally it would be published somewhere if it was a rule. If it is one of the published dress standards at her school, then you don't have any grounds on which to argue your view. However, if this is a new standard, then really, the school has to give in on this one.

[deleted account]

get your facts right Jodi i am not dancing around anything the rule is being introduced ,that to me is that they are trying to enforce a rule that didn't exist till now and yes i have bought her clear studs for excursions and special occasions but she still DOES have rights ,i went to different sites and found decisions from laws that they do have rights to have piercings do some checking for yourself ,and just because she has a nose piercing doesn't mean she will be disrespectful or stop learning ,i don't know how you people can say kids have no rights they have rights from pre birth till the day they die just like the rest of us ,we teach them to be strong independent adults but to me that starts from birth not when someone decides there old enough to have a say ,

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 02/05/2014

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Well, first, I would have to say that piercings generally heal after a period of time, so removal of the stud should not be a problem during school hours.

And, while I agree with ear piercing, I don't agree that kids under the age of 18 need other body piercings, or ear gauges, or tattoos. Like Michelle, I believe that they have plenty of time after they reach adulthood to treat their bodies that way.

That being said, many schools have had a rule about piercings being unobtrusive, or not allowed if they don't fall within specific guidelines. So, is this a case of it HAS BEEN a written rule that is now being aggressively enforced? If so, your kid needs to lose the nose stud, and follow the written dress code.

Is this a case of the school is amending the dress code, and putting it in writing? If so, she still needs to comply, as a nose piercing is not really a religious symbol. However, if you are Hindu, or a member of a culture that ritually practices piercing, then you could have a legal leg. If they 'grandfather' piercings, then they have to 'grandfather' everything else, and what's the point of a dress code?

So, unless your child is a member of the Church of Body Modification, or you and your family are Indian, Hindu, or another culture that promotes piercings, she can probably survive the day without the nose stud.

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♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 08/20/2014

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Jason, in your case, I would support your daughter's wearing of the stud. Simply because, as you say, the policy is not across the board, and it's not in writing. Schools also need to figure it out...if they want to have rules, they need to be written.

Jason - posted on 08/20/2014

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I'm a father whose daughter has a nose ring and with that being said, her school is trying to suspend her for having the nose ring, however there is no written rule in any of the schooling dress code prohibiting her having it, their response was it was an understood rule but wasn't put in the books yet, so would this not be a personal discrimination against her self expression, and I really don't care for the nose ring, but my ex-wife allowed her to have it, in the end I have no problem with her having to remove it, but I want it to be across the board and in full writing to everyone, not just to my daughter

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 02/10/2014

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To the OP...Please don't send your entitled kids to Wyoming for school. You have done your best to teach them that the rules don't apply to them, and that as long as they pester and whine and cry hard enough, they will be allowed exceptions to the rule. Kids/adults that have that line of thinking are seen, by me, on a daily basis, and I have to teach them the meaning of the word "NO", as it applies to them.

You have the right to get your kid's nose pierced. She is blessed to have a parent who's lenient enough to alllow a nose piercing at 14. However, the school, the INDIVIDUAL SCHOOL, has the right to NOT allow them to wear piercings. It generally doesn't sit at the state level. And, furthermore, your "attorney" quotes are only applicable in the state in which the attorney is licensed to practice, NOT all over the US, and most definitely not world wide.

Your OP was requesting advice on how to deal with a school rule. The advice given was to COMPLY. She's not going to suffer irrevocable damage by removing the damn stud for school.

Leela - posted on 02/08/2014

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I saw that the poster's account is deleted but I'll still respond. The school has rules and in my view its important that children understand this. Take the stud out during the day. That way your daughter will understand that rules apply to everyone including her.

[deleted account]

this is a law extract and the words REASONABLE and the last sentence of this says SHOULD NOT lay down rigid rules on matters of personal taste and preference that have nothing to do with education ,they can be asked but not made to take it out

[deleted account]

and thats right it was given as a gift so she has a privilege and the right to choose for herself dont talk to me like im an idiot just cause your a teacher my kids are given the right to choose ,i am their parent till they turn 18 then they are considered to be adults ,the schools have taken enough of our rights as parents ,such as you cant do this and your parents cant do that our rights as parents has been dictated and then yous people blame us for the kids of today not having any respect ,no wonder its all screwed up let parents do the parenting and yous be the teachers ,but remember this we as parents will always have the first learning blocks of their lives ,so every time yous take a little bit more of our rights as parents you shape the sort of adults they will be in the long run ,yous are responsible for that

Jodi - posted on 02/06/2014

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No-one is saying children don't have rights. But a nose piercing is not one of them. THAT is a choice and a privilege, just as holding a drivers licence is a privilege. Do you understand the difference between a right and a privilege?

And no, you never once clarified the written policy of your school prior to this. Have you seen the previous written policy (not just hearsay, actually seen it)?

[deleted account]

kids under the age of 16 can be pierced with parent or guardian consent as long as it is stated which part (not being of any private parts)in writing ,this was found on a law-site for kids rights ,the schools can make reasonable demands on dress codes but do not have the rights to tell them to take them out,and unless it is a saftey issue they dont have to take them out,they can ask them to cover them up for say cooking or woodwork but thats it

Jodi - posted on 02/05/2014

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And just for the record, I agree with you that it doesn't affect their learning, and at the school I teach at, it is not a battle they choose to fight. However, at my son's school, he is not even allowed an ear piercing. He got his done and wears a clear earring, which is permitted. But he respects that the school has a policy on this. There are ways to express your individuality without disrespecting the rules.

Jodi - posted on 02/05/2014

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You are still dancing around my question. I asked if there was a policy in place AT THE SCHOOL before your daughter had her piercing done, not when your 21 year old was there.

However, I'd be interested in knowing where the law says that kids have the "right" to have piercings. I thought schools were in charge of their own uniform policy, and I'm pretty sure there is no "law" that says kids have a "right" to piercings.

And let's not forget that with "rights" come "responsibility".

[deleted account]

my 21 year old attended same school with nose and lip done the head teacher told her to remove it but the principle at the time said she didnt have to ,dept of edu said there is no policy to say they cant have it and thats above the school .if the rule isnot with them then how can they enforce it for themselves new principal new rules ,but even the law says kids have the right to have peircings

Jodi - posted on 02/05/2014

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I didn't ask about the state policy. I asked about the school's policy. Schools are actually entitled to have their own rules surrounding uniform and appearance. If they are trying to ENFORCE a rule, then that means the rule is actually there, they are now just trying to enforce it. That's my point.

[deleted account]

there is no state policy for piercings ,there for the school is trying to enforce the rule for themselves

[deleted account]

1 question Shawnn ,how many and how old are your kids ?? i have 6 of different ages 4 are girls and they are all different .i dont live in the dark ages with them. I DO VERY MUCH teach them RESPECT in and out of our home ,my 7 year old has as much right to voice her opinion as my 25 year old ,if i dont teach them to stand for what they believe in people like you ,will be able to stand over them all of their lives ,you believe they have no right to anything other than basics ,but my children EARN everything they get or they dont get it ,her nose piercing was a gift to her ,schools already dictate what they wear and what they eat,for the safety of others i abide by the food but when there is no danger to others and it does-not affect her learning abilities ,then what right do they have to make her take it out,i have found that to let them get there piercings by the time there old enough to chose a career they themselves take them out when they want and it is never an issue because they make the decision for themselves ,there WOULD NEVER be any Suing for anything from my home that i- DO NOT- believe in ,and they are aware that any decisions they make there are always consequences for their actions ,SHE IS RAISED TO BE AN INDIVIDUAL and will never be tort to be anything else and she IS very RESPECTFUL and thats why she has ASKED for my help

Jodi - posted on 02/05/2014

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OK, so the school DOES have a policy and is now just enforcing it? A school can outline any uniform policy it wants. If this has always been a written policy (which you STILL haven't answered really) then suck it up. If they only just changed it now, then you have every right to request that it shouldn't be applied retrospectively to students who have already had their piercings done.

However, Shawnn is right, there isn't an issue with her taking it out while at school.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 02/05/2014

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No, "they" aren't all clones, but "they" do need to learn that the world doesn't always work the way "they" want it to, nor does it always let them do all that "they" think that they are entitled to.

I prefer to teach my kids to be individuals, but to encourage compliance with rules and regulations, because, well, if no one complied, if everyone wanted an exception for something, we'd be back to no rules & regs, a lot of lawlessness and meaningless BS.

Plus, I work in a University setting, and I'm tired of "them" getting out of HS and expecting special treatment because they've never been told that the rules apply to them...

Oh, and your kid doesn't really HAVE individual rights, other than the right to shelter, education, a safe environment, medical treatment, and basic life. The rest are privileges.

If, when she grows up, she applies for a high end job, and is turned down because the employer doesn't agree with her piercing, is she going to sue?

[deleted account]

i believe she has rights and if it isn't a large in your face stud then it isnt any different than ear piercings ,the schools are going to far ,there trying to wrap these kids up in cotton wool ,i have another daughter who went through the same school and had her nose and ears done and it was never a concern ,so as far as checking the rules ,they wernt there ,so i dont believe they have the right to tell her to take it out ,she isnt a little looking 14 year old girl and she has a very strong and independent personality .the school has a right to make reasonable demands on school uniforms but not to invade the childs right to free choice ,i believe a small nose stud is no more a problem than studs in her ears so i will stand up for her all the way ,they are not all clones and there individual rights have to be considered ,and it is not a state policy as far as i can see

Jodi - posted on 02/05/2014

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Is it that it wasn't an issue? Or is it that it has always been one of their written rules, but they just weren't enforcing it?

I don't agree that amending a written dress code retrospectively is okay, but if it was always a part of the written dress code and just not enforced, that is different.

Michelle - posted on 02/05/2014

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I guess the school is trying to catch up to what society is doing. 10 years ago they wouldn't have any children with piercing other than their ears and now it's everywhere.
I personally don't like body piercings on children, they have plenty of adult years to do those thing to themselves. Yes I have had piercings before you get defensive. I just don't think that children should have them.
The school has a dress code and they have every right to amend it when needed and obviously they feel the need to amend it this year.

[deleted account]

no it wasnt ,she has had it done for a while now last year it wasnt an issue ,now they want to change the rules

[deleted account]

they are trying to enforce it this year ,shes had it done for quite a while now and has been at the school for ages ,

Michelle - posted on 02/05/2014

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I agree with Jodi, if it's a part of the dress code then you should have checked it before letting her get it done.
When I went to high school we weren't allowed any piercings apart from 1 hole in each ear for the girls and the boys weren't allowed any.

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