not feel like your replacing a lost baby?

Ashley - posted on 04/09/2011 ( 4 moms have responded )

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so not to long ago found out I was pregnant with our 3rd child .. a miracle and baby since my husband was snipped 2 years ago.. but a couple days ago we were in a accident which has caused me to miscarry this child... my husband is now hoping that it is still possible for us to produce another child once we are able to try again ... but I can't help but feel that doing that would just be trying to replace this child that has been lost.. how do you get over something like that.. I would love another baby but am scared i will feel nothing but guilt if we do manage to get pregnant again!

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I've lost 2 out of my 3 pregnancies. Trust me there is no replacement. My Jamie was my Jamie, Lilian is my Lilian, and this last one he was him. Neither could replace the other.

If anything my first miscarriage allowed me to be on my toes and watch Lilian's devlopment very closely. I had a lot of bedrest at first and had to take progesterone suppliments to stay pregnant.

Ashley - posted on 04/09/2011

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I never miscarried but I lost my son on 6-14-09 to SIDS and he was 8mon old. My current boyfriend and I have been together for 17 months and someday want a baby. He hasn't had any kids, I have a 5 year old as well. He thinks I just want a baby to replace the one I lost and that if we have a baby he/she wouldn't be special because I have 2 babies with 2 different men. No baby can replace the one that you lost. Everything happens for a reason. I'm sorry for your loss, but if things are meant to be it will happen again :) Best of luck.

Ashley - posted on 04/09/2011

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thank you soo much and I am sorry for your loses as well can't imagine how it must have felt to have 2 of them ... right now I feel so empty like wishing we hadn't been in accident that if we had of waited another 15 mins then we wouldnt be going through this right now.... but of course there was no way of knowing this would happen :( thanks for the nice things you said though

Cheyenne - posted on 04/09/2011

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im sorry for your lose. i had 2 miscarriages before my son was born. i was 18 for the first 2 and found out 4 days before my 19th birthday about my son. my first one was at almost 4 months and my 2nd was at 7 weeks both within a 5 month period(from the end of the first to the end of the 2nd) when i got pregnant with my son i was scared to death because i thought for a long time i would loose him. i had gotten pregnant with my son within a month of losing my 2nd so that was scary too. i still think about the 2 i lost but i dont really feel like i replaced my son. my son's name is : nathan. it means a gift from god. thats what you should think about that as. god is giving you a second chance and a gift. if its meant to be then its meant to be. just dont feel like your replacing the one you lost, many women go through this daily. your not alone.

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