Our 15 yr old granddaughters boyfriend

Kathy - posted on 04/11/2016 ( 8 moms have responded )

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Our 15 yr old grand daughters boyfriend was face timing her friends wanting them to show private parts while he jacked off. She broke up with him. we were very glad BC he was very controlling and upset her all the time. Now she has been sneaking and talking to him and wants to have a relationship with him again . We are totally against this. Never dealt with a pervert before!!! Any suggestions?????

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Megan - posted on 04/13/2016

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Do some reading on how to help a teen girl feel empowered on her own. this book is good... http://amzn.to/1VVt5tG but there are several. Read it first then ask her to read it. She needs to have her eyes opened to reject a controlling guy. this might help as well http://amzn.to/1SaxgiX
help her understand how wonderful she truly is and that she should hold herself to a higher standard than a guy who uses girls. If she does not see the reality of what she is doing, then you should call her school for guidance. This is a serious situation.
Show her tons of LOVE, even when she makes bad choices. Let her know... if you feel like you have to sneak then deep down you know what you are doing isn't right. Help her stand up for herself and know at her core that she deserves better.
Blessings to all of you!!!

Ev - posted on 04/13/2016

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Katy--He is 14 and not that mature. He may know a lot of things that other kids his age have not yet discovered but he is not mature. He is making ridiculous choices and he is a teen. He may be mature on certain aspects of being a person but he has a long way to go. He also needs to know that what he says online or the picture he takes/gets from others that are nude or showing a lot is child porn. A kid who is a teen that is mature for their age would know a bit better than that though they can and do make mistakes. Have you discussed this with his parents?

Kathy - posted on 04/13/2016

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14 yrs old. Very mature for his age. He hangs around a lot of boys in high school.
He tells her how beautiful she is and how much he loves her 50 times a day--- well he did till we took her phone . He can't now BC he sure isn't gonna talk like that in person. Text makes it so kids can say stuff they would not say - face to face.

Kathy - posted on 04/12/2016

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The boyfriend is 14 yrs old... Very mature for his age .he hangs around with older boys in high school.

Kathy - posted on 04/12/2016

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Yes my granddaughter lives with me...we have discussed consequences with her. When we found out she was talking to him again --- we took her phone away. We are just worried that she likes him again. She isn't allowed to date of course. She sees him at school and if she goes skating on a Friday night. We check on her and she does stay at the skating rink. Only problem is --- he goes there. Other than that she plays softball and is here at the house. She isn't allowed to spend night with anyone.we just want him to be history.

Sarah - posted on 04/12/2016

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Some local police departments have classes for both kids and parents about this very issue. I took both and the kids class is scary: they give an example of Jane Doe, full scholarship to college, Harvard Law degree. Volunteer, athlete, lovely, ambitious all around great girl. Goes for a job interview at a top legal firm in Washington and is shown a photo of herself nude from the waist up at 15! End of interview. She thought is was deleted, she believed her BF would delete it and never share it, her dream to be a judge after serving as an attorney- shot to hell. All over one picture.
Check you PD, and school for an internet safety course. Teens think they are invincible. If you are her guardian; then the answer to her dating this boy again is absolutely no.

Raye - posted on 04/12/2016

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Children who take/share nude pictures of themselves is participating in child porn, which is a felony. Explain that this is extremely bad behavior that could get her, her parents, her boyfriend, and anyone else taking or sharing those kinds of photos ARRESTED!

Ev - posted on 04/12/2016

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Does your granddaughter live with you? Do you have guardianship or custody of her? Where are her parents? The best thing you can do first of all is to limit her technology time on phones, computers, tablets etc or cut off the phone and internet totally. Talk to her about his behavior and how bad it is. How old is the BF?

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