Out of control 17 year old HELP please....

Alysia - posted on 02/20/2014 ( 1 mom has responded )




She's 17, her father doesn't live here with us anymore and when he left a few years ago is when she started getting out of control.
Before this she was a great kid, who managed her grades, did good in school and now I barely see her report card, she's truant (court for it) and been skipping classes staying home even though it was HER decision to go back.

The year her father left she got caught with alcohol when she was 14 at school, faced expulsion but we were able to avoid that with a 10 day suspension.
the next year she got kicked out of school again (highschool now) for marijuana possession.
That year she got kicked out of the alternative school she was placed in. (same reason)
She returned next year but got expelled 3 months into the year, (Same reason)
Caught her smoking, she had a drug overdose off K2, a month after that, hospitalized for a few hours.
She has been caught sneaking out, I punished her plenty of times for all of this.

She hasn't been allowed to go out with friends, have a phone, even had her homeschooled.
During that period she was homeschooled which was from 2011- Aug 2013. She had been doing SO good, passed every random drug test, was sweet, never got in trouble
But when she returned she got truancy, which i understand because we had family problems and she wasn't used to returning to a school (Social anxiety)
Now last month she had gotten caught shoplifting, and we have to go through court all over again, i don't think i have it in me.

Her father lives in Japan after leaving the navy, and settled there. We barely speak but i have called him asking him to take her.I'm in tears, I don't want him to take my baby but i don't know what to do with her anymore.
She apologizes saying she's made mistakes but how many 'mistakes' could there be!!!!!!???
She knows right from wrong, i think her problem is not caring. I work full time but I'm home whenever she is.
We don't have that close mother daughter bond, where we discuss everything.

Should I send her away for the summer? She heard me say that and took it as me not wanting her anymore.... not true... I think she needs discipline and time away for her to respect me.
She barely treats me like a mother, i always think of her, even if it's bringing home a little cupcake from where I work.
Why doesn't she think of me when she messes up...?
Im hurt.
Please help, advice. Am i doing the right thing?


Jaime - posted on 02/20/2014




is there another family member she looks up to ,maybe get her to talk to them n take baby steps to get your bond back sounds like shes crying out for help hope this helped take care wish u luck

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