Parent/Friend yells, swears, and is verbally abusive to your child

Melissa - posted on 11/09/2015 ( 2 moms have responded )

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I don't know how to handle this situation. My very good friend and neighbor became verbally abusive and yelled at my child. Her younger daughter age 7 came over to get my daughter to play who is 12. My teenage son and his friends were over and pretended to lock her out and one of his friends threw an empty pop can at her but did not even hit her. Her daughter comes over on a regular basis and is always teasing my son usually hitting or slapping him and can get a bit annoying and they tease her back. My friend was also well aware that when she sent her daughter over to my house no adults were there because we were at her house. Well her daughter told her mom later that night what happened and she freaked out and sent her husband over here to tell me this was not acceptable. I questioned my son in front of her husband and he said they were teasing her but it wasn't to be mean. I told my son that he is older that he should set the example and that him and his friend took things a little far. At this point I told my son to go to the neighbors and apologize to her daughter, i was not there when he went over. The mother started yelling at him when he told her he was there to apologize and started swearing and calling my child names that was very verbally abusive and ripped the earphones out of his ears. I asked my friend if she swore and yelled at my son and she texted me back she sure did. Her husband came back over and told us that she said my son was smiling when he came over to apologize and had attitude. My daughter was there because the girls were gonna have a sleepover at which point was so scared went to hide in there bathroom and said that the mother was out of control. I sent my boyfriend over to get my daughter and the mother also yelled and screamed at him about it, meanwhile my daughter was so scared she ran home in the dark without him and came in shaking and crying. I sent her long email how inappropriate her behavior was, but she is a very good friend. I don't know if I should try to reconcile or cut off the relationship as I feel I can't trust that she can control her angry outburst.

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Dove - posted on 11/09/2015

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Sounds like it's time to end that friendship... on all accounts. I'm surprised your 12 year old daughter is actually friends (to the point of having sleepovers vs just socializing out in the neighborhood) w/ a 7 year old girl. They can't possibly have that much in common that this is a friendship worth keeping. I would have your entire family cut off all contact w/ their entire family.

Raye - posted on 11/09/2015

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If she doesn't show remorse for over reacting, then you might have just lost a friend. I would definitely cool things off with them for a while, not allowing the children to interact. You should also stress to your kids not to tease people, and to let you know if other kids are acting inappropriately so you can intervene. If you knew this girl regularly was a nuisance to your children, you should have put a stop to that earlier. Yes, kids will be kids, but they don't need to be rude.

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