play group

Priyanka - posted on 07/31/2012 ( 2 moms have responded )

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i have 23 month old boy.i hve started with his play group 1 month .but he cries a lot there.he dont want to play there.but he keep on crying and saying mummy.he is very active child otherwise.he has never left me.i hve always been around him.i am realy worried how much time will he take to settle.its very difficult for me to leave him crying.his teachers say he will settle but i am worried.

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Louise - posted on 07/31/2012

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In many playgroups they have a strict policy that they will only allow a child to cry for 10 minutes before the mother is called back. The reason for this is it unsettles the children and becomes a bigger problem if they dont. If you are not being asked back then your child is settling without you. Lots of children get into the habit of crying when left because they can see mums upset. If you act positive around him with lots of smiles and appear calm and stress free this will help him to settle quicker and will also enforce a positive move on your behalf. Sometimes it is necessary to be firm with the child and firmly say no, there is no need for that silliness mummy is going to have a cup of tea and I will see you later. He will stop in time when he realises that crying is not getting him noticed.

Dove - posted on 07/31/2012

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Do you HAVE to leave him (like for work or something)? Is this an every day thing or just once/twice a week?

He's not even 2 yet, so if you don't HAVE to leave him... I wouldn't. Then again, I'm against daycare type situations for a child under 3 unless circumstances make it absolutely necessary. I'm a big believer in a child being with mom, dad, or another individualized caregiver (the occasional babysitter/relative or small home day care) under the age of 3. IMO (and I believe there is research, though I don't have access to any links), kids do better when cared for by a parent almost constantly for the first 3 years of life.

If this is just for the social interaction aspect... there ARE play groups where mom and child attend together. That is what I have always done for the under 3's. Kids get to play AND mom's get some social interaction with other mom's. ;)

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