Playing with his 'business'

[deleted account] ( 67 moms have responded )

My little boy is 8 months old today, I have a little issue. I refuse to call it a problem.... yet.
If you take his diaper off... he's PLAYING WIFF IT
pulling, tugging, pinching... I have to literally PRY his hands out of the way to fasten the tapes on a new diaper! When you put him in the tub.. there's one hand, under the water, ALL the time. He wont let GO!!!!!
Now I have seven brothers ( I was the only girl ) and my mom says that NONE of my brothers "found" it till they were maybe two or three. This boy is 8 months and he has been doing this for months!
Is it normal to start playing with it this early? Do I ignore this habit? Do I act like it's no big deal?
I don't want to scar him, or make him think that his privates are a no-no....
Do I shun him from this? He's really too young to sit down and talk to him about it, he's not doing it in public.. yet.
Is it bothering him? does it itch, or burn? Are there any physical signs I can look for to see if there is a medical issue? ( I see NOTHING out of the ordinary now)
Why is he tugging non STOP?

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Jennifer - posted on 01/01/2010

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First off the bat I would make an appointment with the ped. just to be sure there is not a problem you are unaware of like a bladder or yeast infection etc. I doubt its anything like that but you want to err on the side of caution. While you are there its always great to ask your ped. for some advice if that will help you feel comfortable with a course of action. I will say though that it is normal for a baby to play with their privates just like any human! The only difference is a baby does not understand shame only what feels good and what does not. So your lucky baby just happened to stumble on his private area probably by accident since babies tend to grope and pull at anything they can as part of their natural learning proccess. When he gave it a rub it probably felt interesting or even pleasurable so now since he does not have any way to understand privacy, shame or apropriateness he is naturally just doing what feels good to him. Just be very gentle and tell him no in a positive and gentle way. Most importantly, TALK TO YOUR BABY. They understand hundreds of words that they cannot yet say themselves. Your baby learns through your communicating with them so explaining to him as you are telling him no will help to educate him on why he should not be randomly tugging his privates in front of others. Never ever make it a shameful thing or make him feel dirty though as that can scar for life. Good luck!

Alice - posted on 12/29/2009

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Okay...I don't normally reply or post anything, but I saw this and thought that I could shed some light on this. First off, every baby is different but this is completely natural. It is best to not make a big deal of it, because that will just make it more interesting to him. It's possible that he has noticed you react to it, and is just doing it more often because of that, and it's also possible that he is just curious. At this point, he is too young to understand that it's private, that might cause other issues such as it's wrong for him to even have it, you know? You have to think like an 8 month old. At that age it's not a sexual thing. It may feel good to him, but not that way. Just let it be for now, talk to his pediatrician if it continues. :)

Jaime - posted on 12/27/2009

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He's curious...some boys find it earlier than others....whenever my son has his diaper off, for a change or a bath he has his hands on his penis, tugging, pulling, squishing. They have no idea what it is, all they know is that it feels good to play with it and that's okay. Your son is normal and there is nothing for you to worry about. When he is older, if he is constantly touching his penis in public, then you can address it and let him know he has to have private time away from other people.

Norma - posted on 02/14/2015

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I am a mom... this TOUCHING is normal ,and happens with all boys,since the dawn of creation,i do not see why so many millions it seems of mom are concerned,this is as,all child therapist will tell you is normal, with l,infants and little children they are not the same as an adult...Now,many moms see the handling of the genitals as " wrong" or "perverted " as religions ans society says that genitals are very..bad ,nasty,and obscene.We moms must reject this kind of sicko teachings We parents need to teach our kids that the body is Not nasty or obscene,but beautiful and acceptable. Some mom will tell an infant or small child,that touching the bad part god will take you and burn you. up,or do not touch that awaful thing or it will turn black and fall off...this is very damaging and will cause shame guilt and anxiety for life.As i stated ,all therapists will tell you that this is normal and natural....the child kows nothing of sex...he is just experimenting with his or her bodty and finding a litle pleasurable sensation and comfort. What is wrong with that ?~Mom,,,,chill.

Merredith Erin - posted on 03/26/2014

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I have found that keeping my 7 mo olds son's hands busy while I change his diaper or put him in the bath it stops him from grabbing his "business" usually a fun toys does the trick!

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Norma - posted on 02/14/2015

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DEAR MOM Gail ,I AM A MOM OF SEVERAL BOYS..perhaps you mis spoke ,a boy playing with himself is not inappropriate,all boys in history do it ,wouldn't you say ?~~~Totally normal as all child therapists say. IT IS inappropriate in public of course.

Cinda - posted on 01/15/2010

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My step son found his when he was about 6 months old. He did the same thing. Pulling, pinching, tugging, his little fingernails cut him one time... They eventually stop. Once he gets used to it being there, it won't be something he reaches for constantly anymore. My step son is now 5. At about 2, he discovered that his penis actually changed when he touched it... that was something different altogether. That was more embarrassing for me because people thought it was hilarious. But right now, you can't explain anything he'll understand. Leave it be, and he'll stop.

Rebecca - posted on 01/15/2010

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My little boy does the same thing, its just something new he's discovered and has to figure out what it is. My little girll wasn't as bad as my son but she did the same thing at this age, it is totaly normal i have information on it somewhere I can try and find it and see if theres a website for you

Gail - posted on 01/15/2010

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Give him a fascinating toy to play with when you change his diaper, and keep showing him the toy if he drops it to play with his penis. Do the same thing in the bathtub. He will soon figure out that playing with himself is inappropriate without making a big issue out of it. My son did the same thing. He is now age 40, married and I don't thing there are any problems.

Jennifer - posted on 01/14/2010

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It is totally normal for babies to "discover" their genitals. Just make sure his nails are trimmed so he doesn't scratch himself.

Jesyca - posted on 01/04/2010

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lol...my son did the same thing. I talked about it with his doctor during a routine check up. The doctor said that it was normal; however, in some cases it could be a cause for concern. Before anything else, and if you have not done so already, try his diapers a size larger and do not fasten it to snug. It could be that his business itches or perhaps has a sensation and sensitivity level that is not common. Like us, if we have an itch we scratch to relieve the discomfort. Most importantly, check with his doctor and research online to see if there are any other such cases.

Cindy - posted on 01/02/2010

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it is perfectly normal for them to it, mine did. he just found it soner than others just like finding thier hands or anyother part of thier body. call your doctor they'll say the samething. if it was bothering him he would cry or fuse in some way. just be patient!!!

Rosaline - posted on 01/02/2010

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My boy had a similar case. He is now 10yrs. It's just a way of discovering himself. He still is a baby so it should not be of concern. It does not itch neither is it an infection. Just let him be the boy he is. He will outgrow it. Hope I have been of help.

Gail - posted on 01/02/2010

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Never punish a child for this...Children experience sexual feelings at a very young age and there is nothing wrong with him trying this out at any age. Later you can tell him about the fact that there are appropriate times and times when that is not appropriate. Little girls do this but at a later age because it is hidden.

If there is anything physically wrong you will notice it right away...it will be red and chapped.

Gail

Felicia - posted on 01/01/2010

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Seriously, this is completely age appropriate behavior. Girls may do the same thing. There is a pleasurable sensation, which will cause him to do it repeatedly. Totally normal.

Ilja - posted on 01/01/2010

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Hahahaha this is normal and probably NEVER going to stop. It makes me laugh we as mommies try to tell our sons not to do it in public,yeah right! Have you watched a baseball game lately, jiggeling the balls like there's no tomorrow!
My son tried to feed his penis a cookie the other day LOL I just figured, "well at least he's learning how to share"

As long as your boy doesn't seem to be in pain or discomfort I say let it be :-)

Sherri - posted on 01/01/2010

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That's a boy thing. I have two boys both did it, stop and would play with it again at an older age. I just kept telling him that is for peeing not for playing. Wash his hands and go about doing something else. He will outgrow it.

Dena - posted on 01/01/2010

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Some of my boys have done the same thing. Its no big deal. Some boys (and girls) just find themselves earlier than others. Don't let it be an issue. To them its just another body part like their feet or their hands. We don't freak out and tell them to stop playing with their feet so why would we when they find their privates? He'll out grow this phase when hes ready to. You don't need to be worried about him damaging himself, I know that it looks like he's going to but he will be fine. Don't worry and everything will be just fine.

Della - posted on 01/01/2010

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I had three boy's an believe me it is very normal they start at all age's ..If he hurt's himself he will stop .I never stopped my boy's from touching when they got older enough to understand i told them it was something other people didn't like to see because it was his private part's . you just have to learn to talk to kid's on their level..

Alexis - posted on 01/01/2010

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While you could bring it up at your next Dr visit..I recommend looking at this behavior as curious and humorous. Both my own son and my nephew frequently felt and grasped, even pinched their penis if it was accessible. This behavior can be discouraged by a simple and consistent, "No not right now sweetie." Reinforce this by placing interesting toys into his hands when diaper changes and baths occur.
This is relatively sensitive skin and when its exposed to fresh, cold air it draws his attention. He's touching what seems interesting, it's that simple.

Leslie - posted on 12/31/2009

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He's just curious. I don't have a boy, but my sister has two. At one of her ultra sounds with her oldest, the nurse started laughing. And asked my sister if she knew what she was having she said yes and the nurse took a picture and stated "it starts in the womb!!" Sure enough we have a picture of my nephew playing with "it" in the womb!! Don't worry about it!!

Danyella - posted on 12/31/2009

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OMG! We are all adults on here, why is it so hard to call a male's anatomy by it's name" PENIS!!!! It's not a wank, the business, it, pee-pee. It's a freakin' PENIS!

It is not uncommon for little boys to play with their penis. And yes, they do play with their penis in the womb. It's not nasty, it's normal and a part of discovery. Girls play with themselves, too!

He's a baby and he doesn't know any better. He just knows it feels good. When he gets older, you just explain that it's okay if he wants to play with himself, but he can do that privately in the bathroom and his room. Do not tell him to lock his door, as this will make the act seem bad or naughty.

The only times you should be worried is if someone else is playing with his penis or he starts to do it in public, or to other children (when he's older).

Hell, guys like fondling themselves. I'm sure his father does, too!

Christy - posted on 12/31/2009

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My son is 1 and is constantly touching, tugging, pulling on his penis also. I just think he is normal and is discovering his penis. It should slow once he gets a little older. Don't worry about it.

Veronica - posted on 12/31/2009

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At that age he doesn't even know what it is. It just something new that he discovered,just like hands and feet. My son did the same thing around that age, I will never forget the first time he discovered it. It was kinda funny. anyways, my son is 2 years old now and for the longest time he didn't bother himself until we started potty training and then it was as if he found it all over again. I try and not make a big deal about it. I just explain to him that putting his hands down his pants in the middle of the living room is not appropriate. But back to your son, at 8 months old he doesn't know what he is doing. I'd just relax and try not to make a big deal.

Crystal - posted on 12/31/2009

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It is totally normal body exploration. There is no reason to worry or try to curtail it

Guillermina - posted on 12/31/2009

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Is comple notely normal yes but if he constanly everytime you change him he does it you as the mother got to let him now ok honey no, no and move his hand because a little today tomarrow and then allways then when you have company and deside to change him you make a poor excuse no because it become a habbit to him and you thought it was cute no so better now or never it grows on him poor jugement

Wendy - posted on 12/31/2009

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My son found his around 9 months old, they are boys, they play with it. It's completely normal.

Melissa - posted on 12/31/2009

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My son has been doing this since he was around 4 months old - he is 18 months old now and he still does it. It does not bother me, it is just a part of his body that he doesn't have a chance to explore while his nappy is on - I choose to think it is only natural and unless he gets older and does it in public I will not go mad at him for it, I just ignore it - hell if I had one I'd probably play with it too LOL He's just a baby, I would leave him be, if he is 5 and playing in public, then this is when I would say 'leave it alone when you are in public, privates are private for a reason' lol good luck

Kristina - posted on 12/30/2009

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Ignore it. Its a guy thing. lol. Both my boy's did the same thing and they dontplay any more. At least not yet. lol. I asked both my boys if it hurt them to do that when they could understand and they said no. So don't worry. Just thank your husband for giving you a little boy. P.S. there are ore wonderful things to comefrom raising little boys. Just wait and see.

Heather - posted on 12/30/2009

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This is totally normal. My sone did the same thing, then it stopped for a while but when he was potty training it started again. This behavior will come and go and like someone else said, it might stop when he is in his 40's and that it a big maybe.

Diana - posted on 12/30/2009

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don't be alarm, some do it early and some do later but all boy's do it and if it was itching or burning, he would be pulling at his diaper.
there is nonething physically wrong with him he's just being a boy

Grace - posted on 12/30/2009

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My son does the same thing when I give him a diaper change. I usually give him something else to play with, such as a toy or teething ring and that seems to be enough to distract him from touching his business.

Jen - posted on 12/30/2009

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I have 2 little boys, one is 4 years old and the other is 18 months, and both of them did the exact same thing! It's perfectly normal, and not harmfull in any way! When he's older just explain that it's not something you do in front of people and encourage him to ask you questions. Worked just fine for us!

Kelly - posted on 12/30/2009

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goodness no ! what ever you do don't shun him for discovering himself. It is 100% normal for babies and older kids to touch themselves. My son is nearly 7 months old and he has been doing that same exact thing for awhile now and it's ok :)) You never want them to think that it is wrong to do that or that their private is a bad thing.

[deleted account]

I've been in the healthcare field for over 30 years. I also have a son. It's normal. They also do it their whole life! As they get old & senile they go back to doing it anytime,anywhere! LOL

Stacy - posted on 12/30/2009

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My son is now 19 months old and he started to put his hands down there also at about 5-6 months. He doesn't do it in public. He only does it when i either take his diaper off or I put him in the bath. My sister has a son who will be 4 soon and she told me that her son did the exact same thing. I ask my doctor about it and he told me that it is just a thing that little boys do and when they get older to watch them and tell them not to do it in public.

Mary - posted on 12/30/2009

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I wouldn't worry about it so much. At 8 months, his hands have realized he can grab things, give him something else to hold while you're changing his pants. I learned the hard time that the less time you react to a behavior like that is the sooner, he moves on to other things. As long as he doesn't have a rash, I would ignore and make less of his "playing" he will more on to betting things to do with his hands!

Eileen - posted on 12/30/2009

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My boys both found theirs around 7 or 8 months. i chose to ignore it mostof the time. In the bath.. it helps to keep the little hands occupied with other things if it bothers you to see. Rest assured its normal.
At changing time, i justgently pull the hand away and let them know its time to be dressed. again.. it helps if you can distract him with a toy or something .
if he's not showing signs of pain when touched, its probably just normal curiosity.
As they get older, I always letthem know its ok to do in private, but not in front of mommy or sisters.. or others.. what ever works for you.

I would certainly draw as little attentionto the behaviour as possible. You do not want him to beafraid of his body, or uncomfortablewith it... just keep your response minimal, calm, and positive.

Ziyanda - posted on 12/30/2009

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My 12 month old also like playing with his willy, i just laugh at him - i think it is normal.

Gina - posted on 12/29/2009

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My son started doing that between 7-8 months as well. It is normal. Some do it earlier than others.

[deleted account]

I have a little boy, he is 13 month old, and he has done it for a long time too. When I change his diaper now, he is still playing and pulling. I don't see a problem. They discover themselves and it problably feels strange. So, I would not worry.

Kristle - posted on 12/29/2009

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all it is is that he has discovered his penis...did you tell him to stop when he discovered his hands, feet, mouth or anything else? no you didn't so trust me it's ok! :)

Mel - posted on 12/29/2009

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Well, my son is 10 months and just like your son, has been playing with it for MONTHS. I see no signs of anything being wrong. In fact, not only does he tug and pinch and pull, but he giggles when he does it. I find it funny actually. My husband and I try not to make a big deal of it, we simply move his hand away when we need to change him or bathe him. We figure if we draw more attention to the act, he might get more curious and heaven knows what he will do with it next. I guess we assume it is just like everything else...as soon as we tell him not to do something, it becomes his favorite thing to try and get away with. We just casually correct him as we go along. Good luck! If you find out anything more, please post it.

Vette - posted on 12/29/2009

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i have 4 girls and 1 son and the girls yanked on it as much as my son has . so really dont make a big deal over it give him a toy to keep his hands out of his yuckie stink ,then let life go on. more to worry about then my18month old yanking his" thing"

[deleted account]

My younger son is almost 9m and he "discovered himself" a few weeks ago. It's just a natural thing for all kids (even girls). If you make a big deal of it, he'll just want to do it more. I just make sure I give my son a toy to play with at diaper changes to keep his hands busy and out of the poop. As long he's not fussing, showing signs of irritation, or hurting himself, I would just ignore it.

Darla - posted on 12/29/2009

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Mine just turn 9 months and he has found his as well. He only seems to grab it when I am changing his diaper so far. I don't really think that there is a set age. I think every baby is different

Julie - posted on 12/29/2009

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It is totally normal. All kids do things at different stages in life. This particular activity doesn't really have a specific age. Little girls do it too. It is not a bad thing! If it bothers you have a toy for him to hold. This should distract him long enough to change his diaper. Good Luck!

Tamara - posted on 12/29/2009

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What's the big deal? It's HIS body and there's nothing wrong with his beautiful penis and nothing wrong with touching it. GEEEZ Louise. CRimminey! Why are you so worried about it?

Michelle - posted on 12/29/2009

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Tis definitely a comfort thing! The boy, bless him, first started grabbing at his penis at around 3 months old. I was more afraid of him getting a piece of his own crap and shoving it into his gob, least to say anything sexual about it! You can only gently guide his wandering fingers away from it and say nothing, carry on with the business of changing his diaper. La di da...but really, he's not hurting anyone, is he? ;)

Louise - posted on 12/29/2009

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Ink

It's a new toy!

It's like when they first discover their toes and start trying to drag their feet up to their faces so they can bite them.

My son discovered his ding a ling (preferable term) just recently and is totally entertained with it. We have nappy free time as it gets so hot here and whenever that happens, boy of boy watch out little fella you're going to be tugged, pulled, pinched and thankfully NOT bitten, until he finds something else to keep him entertained. I'm waiting for the day he pees at the same time, that might just shock him out of it!



I've had three boys and each has had the same thing going on, until something new could be found!

Jane - posted on 12/28/2009

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I agree. Sounds pretty normal, as my little boy is 8.5 months old, and grabs his "wilbur" as his daddy calls it hehe, whenever we change his nappy. We just laugh and say "ouch" coz he grabs & pulls it pretty hard and we are worried he will scratch himself up more than anything hehe.

September - posted on 12/28/2009

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Sounds pretty normal to me. Our son is 14 months old and touches his penis every time I change him. I don't think you have anything to worry about.

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