Rebekah - posted on 06/06/2012
Sounds really stressful... So if they (or one of them) is going to school, does that give you some amount of relief? Will the 5 year old be in more regular schooling in the fall? I know it feels like a long time, but it will get better for you once they are both old enough to be in school and you will regain time back. My son just went to kindergarten this year, and I can't believe all the time I got back for myself. Just hang in there and try to find some "survival" techniques during this period of time until that happens. Can you do any childcare swapping with your friends? They watch your kids for an afternoon while you either get stuff done or just regroup for yourself, and then you return the favor for them? That makes it a no-cost option. Do you or your husband have any relatives that would be available to help supervise the kids? Are you part of a faith community that might have people you trust who would be willing to help with childcare?
As far as managing them during the day, do you have any kind of a general schedule for them? Do you use any reward systems for them? I'm wondering if those things might help their behavior and your management of them. If, for example, they do ok following your directions in the morning, then they can earn a certain activity they enjoy in the afternoon, whether its going to the park, or library, or some such thing. And a schedule...if you build in active times and "quiet times" (like whether they are looking at books or if they are willing to sit for an educational tv program) at the same time every day, maybe it would get them in a routine where you could also use that quiet time to destress or get some laundry done.
Not sure what to suggest about your husband.... I know its hard to ask "more" of him when he works so hard and does his part to provide, but if his kids need time with him too. And if he wants a happy wife, in my opinion he needs to pitch in at home too so you can stay energized and do what you need to do. Motherhood is hard, especially at this demanding age. Best wishes for you.
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