Please help

Grace - posted on 09/11/2015 ( 7 moms have responded )

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I gave birth to my child last year at the age of 19, I was terrified when I find out about this but I learnt to accept it. My baby daddy supported me a lot both financially emotionally during the period and we are now living together, my problem now is that he is always calling his previous girlfriends and meets some of them but he always denies dating them, he never neglects me and does everything a girl could wish for but the thought of him with someone else kills me and it's affecting me as I am doing my final year in varsity next year, am I asking for too much or I should leave him as this is affecting my health , but I also feel like I will disappoint my family again as they were about my pregnancy.

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Trish - posted on 09/12/2015

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You sound very insecure. Like this man holds your value in his hands. How do you see yourself? Does this man hold your worth or do you hold your worth. Sometimes as women our thoughts are our worst enemy. If this man is good to you and not neglecting you...what is the issue? If it is him talking to other females then it is you. Actions are the best indicator of how a man is. If he is a honest person you have nothing to worry about. Focus on baby and your studies. Worry is like walking around on a fine day with an open umbrella waitinng for it to rain. BUT if he is a liar then you got stuff to sort out. Cut him loose to be with his hoes. Him being with someone is NOT the end of the world. You need to priortize what is important. Your baby is before him. Stop giving him so much power over you. Get your power back and look at yourself and know you are worthy of good things and stop living in fear.

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Jodi - posted on 09/12/2015

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It sounds like he isn't really committed. Probably time to question his commitment.

Grace - posted on 09/11/2015

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He would never agree to that we have been together for 5 years now and I just feel like I was just tied to him but his cheating has made me think again, thanks for the suggestions Jodi

Jodi - posted on 09/11/2015

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Perhaps it is time to talk to him about it in counselling. If this continues as it is, your relationship will suffer. Regardless of whether something is going on, he is disrespecting how you feel about it.

Grace - posted on 09/11/2015

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Jodi, we have talked about it and it's always the case where he always win the arguement and assures me that I am the only one he loves and I must just stop worrying, he can call them once every week

Jodi - posted on 09/11/2015

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When you say "always", how frequently are we talking? I think you need to sit down and discuss with him how this is making you feel with the goal that he both acknowledge and accept that rather than dimissing it as he has done.

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