Nadya - posted on 07/04/2012 ( 15 moms have responded )
Can someone please help. I have twin 4 year old girls, that have become a train wreck. They destroy their room, toys, my things. I am tired of people saying they will grow out of it. NO THEY AREN'T!!! IT IS GETTING WORSE!
I work from home, 8 hours a day, off most times on weekends. Nearly every single day they wake up at 5am or so, way before I can even get thinking about waking up and will DESTROY their room. I don't mean toys on the floor. I mean like milk, sour cream, coffee creamer, flour etc ALL over their carpet. EVERY DAY!!!!!!! I wake up to a wreck. I have been setting an alarm for that early to make it stop and am now completely exhausted. Work is suffering, and I may be unemployed soon. Then we are in big trouble. No family, no friends. Single mom.
They took my 700 dollar android and threw it in the bathtub. They admitted they KNEW it was wrong but did it anyhow. I punished them with corner time and taking some toys, and the VERY next day they took the phone and poured pancake syrup on it instead!!! When asked why, their response "because you made us stand in the corner". I don't understand what is happening here!!!!!
I CANT keep them out of ANYTHING!!! They take chairs, or whatever they need to get whatever they want, and are very quiet about it!!! This morning I caught them in the act of dumping soda on their floor and laughing, I punished them yet again, taking the tv out of their room, and the rest of the toys and grounding them. I was exhausted, and fell asleep on the couch. When I awoke, they had taken a bottle of formula 409 from ABOVE the cabinet ABOVE the refrigerator, and doused our 2 little kittens in it. One is blinded, the other is dying, and with no transportation, I have no means to help them. The kids think it's funny and I am at my breaking point.
PLEASE HELP ME!!!!
I have asked people around here for help. I have asked for advice. I have tried every means of punishment possible including spanking. I never believed in spanking. EVER. Then the lady from the daycare said that I HAD to try it, they are out of control. I am a single parent. They don't care what I do it is always worse the next day.
I have been non stop crying for the last 24 hours with the desire to give my children up for adoption. Adoption means I never see them again, so then heartbreak at the thought follows. I can't live without them, but I can't keep going through this. I need to mention that one of them is autistic. High functioning however.
THINGS I HAVE TRIED ON MY OWN ACCORD:
- Time out
- grounding to room
- baby gates (doesn't work, they open them, or climb over them)
- having a custom installer come and put a bi fold door across the wide opening of my kitchen (They snapped it in 3 pieces)
THINGS I HAVE TRIED ON SOMEONE ELSES SUGGESTION:
- Corner time
- loss of privileges (no movies or outside time)
- making them clean it up
- spending more time with them during the day in case this is an attention thing. (this makes them act out worse)
- giving them more to do to occupy them. I invested a lot of money into some really fun things to do, while I work. (They aren't even interested. They played for like 5 mins and haven't touched them again)
- Fenced my yard so they could play in the front yard with the door open unsupervised. (They stood on their toys, climbed the fence onto the hood of my broke down car, and ran off to the neighbors).
My friends are referring to my kids as demon children, they won't help, or even babysit because they can't handle them. I have no family, nowhere to go.
Nothing contains them, nothing stops them from doing this, nothing is effective and it is getting worse. Please...if anyone can suggest a 4 year old proof baby gate, or something, or if anyone has anything to suggest at all, please help me. If anyone has kids like this, especially twins, please tell me your story, I am starting to get scared that I am alone in this.
Please, someone help me before I lose my mind. I love my kids...they hate me!!!!