Please help my sisters partner is wreaking my relationship with my sister.

Aimee - posted on 10/23/2012 ( 7 moms have responded )

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Hello, I need some help. My sister and I have always had a really close relationship but for the last year she has started fighting with me every time her partner is in the room. I end up having to walk away or hang up the phone. Her partner and I have never gotten along and she used to keep the peace between us. For some reason all of a sudden it’s like she can’t handle the fact that I don’t like him. They have been together for 6 years and I have never gotten along with him. We haven’t spoken for 6 weeks now and I have just given birth to my baby and I would really like our relationship to go back to what it used to be but I don’t know how this can happen when every time I talk to her I feel like I’m actually talking to her angry partner who hates me.

I think he has been trying to get between our very close relationship for years and its finally working. I don’t know what I can do as she no longer listens to me and her attacks over the past year that has been very hurtful. I usually end up in tears. After a fight with her one night when I ended up hanging up on her because I couldn’t take it anymore her partner txt me to ask me if I was ok. I didn’t even know that he was there or listening to our conversation. Please help....

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~♥Little Miss - posted on 07/26/2015

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Holly - posted on 10/24/2012

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it seems to me that her relationship with this man is not a healthy one, so she REALLY needs you there by her side... but when you make it known that you don't like her "partner" he is going to push you out of the picture more and more. I was in an abusive relationship, and that is what they do... the make you get away from ANYONE who doesn't like them

Elizabeth - posted on 10/24/2012

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I would not trust the text. He could use it as another tool to come between you and your sister. I think you have to accept the partner and his comments if you want to be close with your sister. I am not sure I could do it, I would be mad at her for taking his side but maybe you can make sure to be there and listen to her so she does not start to feel alone when she needs to get out of that relationship. I have a sister who was married to one of those and he left her a mess with no self esteem. I know it is hard, family is a tricky but I do know even sisters will not dump a man when they do not want to be alone for anyone. Good luck and hang in there, she will always be your sister, it just may take a bit for her to remember. Congrats on your new baby, what a wonderful time for you, I hope she stops and realizes how lucky she would be if she shared this time with you.

Holly - posted on 10/24/2012

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Hun if you want your sister back, you may very well have him in your life Forever. You don't realize that, when you try to push him away, you push her away too. The more you ACT as if you support them as a couple, you will get your sister back.

Aimee - posted on 10/23/2012

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I think you misunderstand. He has always been very rude to me and now has my sister fighting with me. My relationship with my sister is none of his business and Im never going to like him or the way he treats her. She is choosing to stay with him even though he is very contolling and takes drug. They have four children and he does nothing to help her out around the house or with parenting, he just plays playstation games. I dont want him in my life ever! But i do want my sister back. He has never txt me before. I dont even have his number because I dont talk to him.

Holly - posted on 10/23/2012

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You have to be the bigger person and try to extend an open hand to get partner. Apparently, he is going to be there for a long time. It actually seems that he had tried to with you at one point, when he text you to see if everything is ok

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