Kiara - posted on 04/19/2013 ( 1 mom has responded )
I have a two and half year old son and a husband that I have known for 4 years. Needless to say, there is a lot going on... From money issues, to our son being in the hospital... And since he is in the hospital, I decided I would be the one to stay home and work while my husband stayed with our son in the hospital. There has been an ongoing struggle with us as family with me not keeping a job and me not being motherly enough.. And I am at my wit's end! I dont know what to do anymore! I work... Im screwed because I wasnt being motherly enough... I stay with our son... I STILL screwed because there is a chance that I could lose my job. The ugly shadow of divorce is keeps appearing in our conversations and more frequently than I would like to admit... However I will admit to not being as motherly as possibly could be... Which got me wondering... WHY? Do I not love my child? What is it that is making me choose other things besides being with him while he is sick??? I did some research and there is a chance that I could have PPD (we have looked into it before and I am still showing signs). I am thankful that I have not wanted to hurt my child but I have considered hurting myself. If someone can please help... Advice... Places where I can get help... Tips... Anything will be appreciated.