Dee - posted on 02/05/2013 ( 2 moms have responded )
I've been reading about postpartum depression and wanted insight or advice from anyone who has dealt or is dealing with it.
I am 30 years old and have a 2 1/2 year old and a 3 month old. I thought I was going to be so happy once my son was born, like my first child, but I'm not. It's making me depressed because I am annoyed and angry with him most of the time. I feel like I can't do a anything. I'm not working, so I stay up until 9 - 11 am and sleep my 8-10 hours. I nurse so I wake up every 1 1/2 hours to feed him. Is my disturbed sleep schedule making me feel this way? Or do I have post parturition depression? My son bit my nipple in my sleep and I smacked him because of my reflexes. It was totally not on purpose. But the scary thing is I didn't feel upset I did. Its almost like i felt he deserved it. The fact that it didn't upset me and i felt better, like he ha
d it coming, is what's scaring me. I would feel so guilty if it was my daughter. How could I ever feel that way towards my own child? sometimes cry because I feel like I'm the worst mother ever and cannot believe I am feeling this way. I always thought postpartum depression was an excuse those crazy mothers used to kill their children.
Please so not put any judge mental or hateful comments back - because i Already hate myself enough. Please give me any advice. Thank you in advance.