potty training?

Liza - posted on 01/11/2013 ( 1 mom has responded )

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Help, My son Joshua is now just about 3 and a half years old. He's still not potty trained. I don't know what to do. I constantly ask him if he needs to go pee and always says no and then stands there and pees threw his pants or into his pull up. Everytime i try to sit him on the potty he screams as if he's scared of it. I dont know what to do anymore. I feel like i've tried everything.

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Ariana - posted on 01/11/2013

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Are there any 'older' boys around Joshua that he knows who you could have bring him to the potty? If he has a cousin or friends child that you could 'borrow' to do that with him? Sometimes showing kids a 'big boy' who uses the toilet that they like will make them want to act 'bigger' like so and so.

You might try playing pretend with his animals and have them use the potty and make a game out of that, or tell/read him stories involving animals that learn to use the potty. Anything you can do to sort of try and get him interested in using the potty through the 'backdoor' way.

I wouldn't try to force him on the potty if you know he's giong to scream, and also maybe don't ask him. If it's possible you could try and tell him he needs to use the potty at certain times, so you could tell him, we always use the potty before we leave the house, or before we eat lunch or something so he gets into more of a routine of using it instead of asking (my son always says no when I ask him if he has to go, even when he's obviously jumping around). Sometimes I have to tell him, you're jumping around which means we needs to use the potty, and bring him up even when he's not wanting to go, but he doesn't scream about going on it anymore so I'm not sure what you could do to help alleviate him from that.

Is he going on an actual potty or a toilet? Because my son was freaked out by the toilet because it was so big so we had him start of facing towards the toilet so he didn't feel like he'd fall in, and I got him a toilet seat to put ontop of it so he wouldn't feel like he's falling.

You could try to bribe him with a promise of stickers if he sits on it, and tell him what a great job he did even if it was only for a couple seconds (the encouragement and yay you're such a big boy! is the most important part).

If you try all these things and it doesn't work I would let him wear a diaper for a month, without trying to get him to use the potty or anything at all, just let him use the diapers. Once you've waited a month try again at encouraging him to use it.

You don't want to make it into a power struggle because you can't win it, sometimes the more we try to get them to do it the more resistant they become. If it's at the point where he's not using it because he doesn't want to give in to you it's better to take a break and try again fresh another time.

If he really is scared I assume he's old enough to maybe try and tell you why he'd be upset. If he's actually scared of it you might try to convince him to bring a special potty toy (maybe a special stuffed animal?) who can sit with him and make sure everythings alright, or anything that will make him more comfortable. My son used to make me hug him while he sat on the toilet for like 2 weeks before he'd sit by himself. I have no idea why but it seemed to help him be calmer.

Whatever you do don't turn it into a struggle, good luck!

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