Pregnancy at 44, is there a chance

Maria - posted on 06/22/2013 ( 75 moms have responded )

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Hello out there, wanting to hear from any mothers who are 43-45 and have successfully gotten pregnant with their own eggs either first child or 2nd any good news would be great. I just heard of someone at 44 who is pregnant and you always hear these stories but I guess I want to hear some more so that I have hope that it's not too late for me.

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Kym - posted on 06/30/2013

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Hi, I'm 42 and I just had my last baby. :-) I know you said 44 but I'm close. Everything was natural, my own eggs and the old fashioned way etc. The baby I just had was #7 for me... But, I've lost 4 over the last multiple years. So I now have a total of three at home that are all healthy and happy and all were at least 9lbs. At birth! The only grief I had during this pregnancy and truly through the last 3 pregnancies was from doctors who felt I was too old or too fat or too something. So "because" I was too old, too fat etc. They made me take every test under the moon to make sure baby was Ok. So glucose test I had to do 3 times (Yuck), countless ultrasounds and bloodtests to rule out trisomy 13, 18 and 21. And at the end of all of it came my son who is perfect in everything. The Dr's are very sad with their #'s and percentages, so I had to not listen. Everything turned out fine, he's perfect, happy, and content. So I an too...
God Bless you, and I'll keep praying your dreams are answered. Stay positive and pray for good things.
Love to you and yours!
Kym

Angel - posted on 10/10/2013

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Hi Maria, just checking in! I hope you're managing to keep the faith. One of my greatest challenges when I was 44 and TTC was fear that it couldn't happen, and anxiety surrounding my ability to conceive in my 40's. Here's a useful article from Reproductive Psychologist, Julia Bindeman, who lists ways in which you can let go of your fears about being too old to conceive: http://achildafter40.com/fears-about-con...
In line with that, is another piece by a massage and aromatherapist (who is TTC over 40 herself!) about how you can use essential oils to calm yourself and enhance your fertility over 40: http://achildafter40.com/increase-fertil...
It's also really important to explore the many other suggestions posted by others here as well: acupuncture, fertility diet, supplements, exercise, etc. If you're looking for more ideas or info, please feel free to post a question! :) Stay positive!

Sandy - posted on 06/30/2013

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Hi, we were having difficulties conceiving our first daughter, it took 3 years of trying and I finally fell pregnant at the age of 38 and gave birth 2 weeks after my 39th birthday. Our daughter was perfect in every way and after her 1st birthday we decided to try for number 2. Again, after 3 years of trying to conceive, I had given up hope of falling pregnant again. I had just had my 43rd birthday and on my daughters 4th birthday we discovered that we were pregnant again! I am now 16 weeks along and baby is strong and healthy. I know it sounds very "cliched" but if you don't think about it, it seems to happen. Best of luck

Maria - posted on 06/30/2013

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Please continue to share the positive stories, these are great. Please I'm not interested in negative feedback or grim statistics, I know the statistics and the odds , I get plenty of that from doctors, but I also know many women out there have had babies in their 40's naturally or with help with their own eggs so please keep the positive stories coming.

thank you very much to those who have shared.

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Kathleen - posted on 10/18/2013

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Hello, I'm a 42 year old mom of 7.5 of the children are my biological children and 2 are my step children.I had a tubal and my husband had a vasectomy.My husband and I are currently going through ivf ..we are just about ready to start our first cycle.I haven't told many people of our plans because I do not want to hear the negativity.My oldest is 21 my yougest is 10.I'm hopeful that we will be successful.So far we have only had encouraging results as far blood work the condition of my uterus.My husband is having his sperm retrieval done the beginning of nov.I think what I'm most nervous about is the fact that there are so many variables making a successful cycle truly a blessing.

Maria - posted on 10/13/2013

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Well like everyone keeps telling, me don't give but also explore other options. I am as well, looking into adoption and well just trying to be open to all possibilities. It seems to me that all the stories I hear of women in their 40's who got pregnant, it happened when they weren't trying. I think it's hard to give up trying, at least I know it is for me because I think we're taught in this society that if we try hard for things, we'll get the response we are looking for but that's not always the case with fertility. In any case don't give up. I know a woman who had a baby at 45 - without even trying, again one of those stories. Keep the faith and I will be praying for you.

Maria - posted on 10/13/2013

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Thank you, I'm trying not to lose hope, it's getting tough. I just went through my 3rd IVF and while my doctors said I had a good response to all 3 of my IVF, something is not happening. I am going to go the natural route, doing acupuncture, taking herbs, let's see how that goes. Than you for your encouragement, it means a lot.

Sherry - posted on 10/12/2013

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I am 44, ttc first child. Been doing napro/Creighton for 2 years, trying for 5. Hormone levels are great with meds for me, husband also ok.
Doc says if you wouldnt know my age, we should have conceived by now. Just quit very stressful job a month ago. I have faith but feel I'm running out of time. Trying to change eating and exercise habits now that i quit my job. Had two hsp surgeries and tubes are open.
Any words of inspiration for me?

Angel - posted on 09/23/2013

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Hi Maria! I had mine at 41 and 44 years of age after conceiving naturally with my own eggs! I'm now an advocate for women on the journey of motherhood after 40 and manage a support site. I can assure you that I hear from women every day who have conceived over 40, so there is hope! :) Best thing to do is see your doc and have your reproductive health checked out. Our support site has tons on info on conceiving naturally, as well as inspirational stories from moms over 40. E.g. this week's article is from a doctor of Chinese medicine on how to increase fertility naturally over 40: http://achildafter40.com/increase-fertil...
Anxiety over whether or not you can conceive is your biggest enemy--keeping the faith with positive visualizations, relaxation therapies, and doing as much research as you can on how to enhance fertility is the way forward! :) Please keep us posted!

Kerry - posted on 07/04/2013

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Lunesa, the only thing I did, like someone else suggested is start taking prenatal vitamins NOW, it's really important to have that extra folic acid in your system before you get pregnant. You will get a test done (I forget what it's called) where dye is injected into to your uterus so they can check your uterus and fallopian tubes for fibroids or blockages. The IVF Dr. should set this up for you. And, your husband will have his sperm checked for count and mobility. Hopefully both those tests are good and you can start on the medication right away ( also depends on where you are in your menstrual cycle though). Giving myself daily shots was no big deal, the needle was tiny and I barely felt it. This is so you will ovulate multiple eggs, giving you a much better shot at getting pregnant since normally women only drop one egg per menstrual cycle. Like I said, I was glad my doctor said he was comfortable putting 8 eggs back in that were of a high grade because we really wanted the IVF to work. We had already been through 3 IUI's and lost 2 pregnancies so we had been through a lot emotionally already. We only did the IUI's because they are a lot less expensive but chose to do an AIVF because the chances wrote greater at getting pregnant since they take the eggs out, introduce the sperm (in a dish), watch them for a few days to see how they divide, then you and the Dr decide how many to put back in. This way all the work is done, except for the implanting in the uterus lining. With an IUI, they just inject the sperm I to your uterus and don't take the eggs out, so you have to hope the sperm gets into the eggs or at least one egg then implants. If I were to do it over again, I would go straight to IVF since the chances are much higher at getting pregnant. Any other questions, please ask, I am happy to share my experience and very hooefil for you. Much love, Kerry

Lunesa - posted on 07/03/2013

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Hi Kerry,
Thank you so much for your great adviced and I would lovely take it. My husband told me also that we will not waste our time before its too late. Yes, I've finally called the IVF hospital last monday to have an appointment. I'm so excited and more inspired now because of your story. What did you do or what is your preparation before having an IVF? Do you mind to give me some tips please!
Thanks again and Congratulations!

Kerry - posted on 07/03/2013

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I would take her advice and do IVF, don't waste your time doing it "naturally" if you really want to have a child. Why does it matter if it is "natural" or IVF as long as you get pregnant. Sorry, just that I would act while you are still ovulating and making eggs because that window of opportunity could close at any time.

Kerry - posted on 07/03/2013

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I just want to let you know that I gave birth last year at 45. I thought it was not going to happen, but we needed help (IVF with my eggs and my 49 year old husband's sperm). Thing is, we didn't waste any time trying to get pregnant on our own, we knew better. Starting so late, we decided to gostraight to a specialist at an IVF clinic. Get all yyour stuff checked as well as your husband's (trust me, you don't want to waste the time or money or let it take an emotional toll trying if something isn't "working"). Also, our Dr. was "aggressive" with the treatment and put 8 eggs back in. They check the eggs to see how they're dividing and grade them. Some Dr's may only put 1 or 2 eggs back in but mine said the chances of twins or triplets was practically nonexistent so we did it. Hope this helps.
Kerry, mom to a 13 month old healthy, happy little girl.

Shorte_face - posted on 07/02/2013

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My mom was 43 when she had her last kid he is now 8 he is so smart and healthy. No problems at all also she didn't plan it. She had him natural and he was altmost 11 lbs when she had him

Susan - posted on 07/02/2013

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Hi Maria, I've just turned 45 last week and we are trying to have a baby, my partners 41, I have 4 grown up children youngest being 19, also I am a Nannie too! I feel it's the right time for another baby, so I wish you all the best, and hope we both get our babies really soon, be positive and keep everything crossed, sue x

Shannon - posted on 07/01/2013

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Yes, she was 51 when her youngest was born. The pregnancy was unplanned, but successful. It should be noted, however, that she had ten children beforehand. From what I understand, a woman is born with a finite number of ovum, and ovulation generally does not occur during pregnancy. It stands to reason that each full-term pregnancy a woman has extends her child-bearing potential by nine months or so. If this is true, then my friend's chances of conception at 50 we're about equal with a first-time mother in her early 40's.

Lunesa - posted on 06/30/2013

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Thank you all guys who posted here some inspiring stories. I've been married for 15 years already still trying and hoping that someday ill become a mother. I am inspired today when I read all your stories that there are lots of mothers who were still got pregnant in thier late forties and thanks God I still have a big chance to get pregnant as well. I am now turning 45 this coming september that's why my fertility specialist pushed me to go for an IVf but was relactunt for me because I truly believe that I can still conceive naturally. I've been treating for 6 months now already with TCM but still nothing happen I don't know why the only problem that I have is my 3 fibroids occurred 5 months ago but my fertility doctor said that it is not really the problem because she has lots of patient who has also fibroids and then got pregnant. I was very happy when I got my progesterone test result last week (22.5) that im still ovulating. Please advice me what to do if I have to go for an IVF. Thank you very much in advance.

Yvette - posted on 06/30/2013

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I had mine when I was 43y.o. Was born healthy and has given us lots of reasons to be happy! I was really worried most of the pregnancy, but determined to have our child. Best decision ever! Congratulati and happy pregnancy!

Ariyibi - posted on 06/30/2013

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Sorry I forgot to add this- the pregnancy was smooth with no nausea, morning sickness or vomiting unlike the first two. I could well with no cravings for anything in particular. I was strong all through by God's grace. It also happened when I least expect it.

Ariyibi - posted on 06/30/2013

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I had my last baby at 41 after over 10yrs gap between her and my second child. The pregnancy was conceived the natural way. The baby is fine and perfectly normal to the glory of God. She was 3.8kg at birth , delivered at 38weeks. Keep praying its the best option out.

Mrs. - posted on 06/30/2013

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My mother had my brother when she was 41.

I also go to a TCM doc who specializes in helping those with fertility issues. She has had great success with women who are in their forties. However, it is important to know it isn't easy, they have to be super dedicated to making it happen. If you haven't tried TCM it might work for you too.

It is possible and it can happen.

Adriane - posted on 06/30/2013

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The oldest on record for a naturally conceived pregnancy is 59, I think. You can Google it. These later, natural pregnancies are usually a surprise. Yes, my 52 yr old professor conceived naturally, with her own egg, the old fashioned way. It wasn't planned, but they were overjoyed. Their baby was perfectly healthy.

Maria - posted on 06/29/2013

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thank you for sharing, yes reason I was asking first child is because it seems as though it is easier to get pregnant in your 40's after you've had a child earlier in life but that is not a scientific fact just a very strong correlation but thank you for sharing, love to hear it.

Sal - posted on 06/29/2013

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I'm 39 and preg with natural conception, I won't gloss I
Over the fact that I had 2 miscarriages in the last year and i didnt fall preg as easily as i had previously andI really notice the difference on my body from earlier pregnancies but if you take care of your self and listen to your dr I can't see why not.. Just don't expect miracles to happen quickly.
The reason you haven't fallen pregnant in the past is probably also relevant so take that Into account too

Maria - posted on 06/29/2013

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I've been praying a lot and meditating and just thinking positive thoughts and I believe in the power of prayer. I will accept help from everywhere.

thank you

Maria - posted on 06/29/2013

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really 51. Were they her own eggs? I think the oldest person in medical documented history to have a child with their own eggs is 48, haven't heard of anything beyond that but wow I guess we have to keep reminding ourselves that if you have your period you can get pregnant regardless of the percentages.

Thank you for sharing.

Adriane - posted on 06/29/2013

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Be sure to begin taking prenatal vitamins BEFORE trying to conceive, especially the folic acid which can help prevent birth defects.

You haven't divulged your views on when life begins, but in case you believe life begins at conception or have religious views that may affect your decision, there are some issues you should be aware of if you are unable to conceive naturally. You may want to discuss them with your priest or pastor if you have one. There are a variety of treatment options that are usually acceptable to most religious groups before it is necessary to consider IVF. IVF is acceptable in some and not in others. In my church, for instance, IVF is only acceptable if the egg and sperm are from the married couple and if all embryos are used. Using a donor egg or sperm would be considered violating the sanctity of marriage because the creation of the child involves contributions from persons both inside and outside the marriage, and since we believe life is valuable from the moment of conception and that God is the source of life, it would be unthinkable to donate, destroy, or dispose of "extra" embryos. This means that only a limited number of embryos could be made with each attempt (or there is risk of being Octomom and a very risky pregnancy) and the couple may have to spend more money for multiple attempts if the first attempt is "unsuccessful." Another thing to consider is the high failure rate of IVF embryos to implant and continue to live and grow. Another option is "Snowflake babies", which are embryos that are "leftover" from others' IVF attempts that they either did not want to use or couldn't. These embryos can be "adopted" for less than some traditional adoptions. This is unacceptable in some faiths (I think Roman Catholicism?) and acceptable in others because the embryo/life already exists, and it is seen much like traditional adoption. Snowflake babies are carried by their adoptive mothers though and, in some states, are automatically considered the adoptive parents' children. Traditional adoption is also a great option, which is acceptable in most, if not all, religious faiths. It can be expensive as well, but there are a lot of great resources out there as well as tips for covering expenses. My friends that have adopted babies have had wonderful, life-changing experiences. I wish you the best!

Yvonne - posted on 06/29/2013

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My mom got pregnant with my little brother (her 6th child - all of us have the same father even though there is 17 years between my oldest and youngest brothers) at age 42. Aside from some jaundice, he was perfectly healthy and normal. She got pregnant again at 44 but miscarried that pregnancy. The doctor tested the embryo and found that it was perfectly normal and her body should not have rejected that pregnancy - but my mom was diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes a few years later so she believes she miscarried it because she already had the Type 2 diabetes and her body couldn't handle being pregnant. Good luck!

Cathi - posted on 06/28/2013

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I have a friend who had 3 successful and healthy pregnancies after 40. No fertility drugs needed and no problems... good luck to you!!!!

Meshelle - posted on 06/28/2013

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Hi I just had a baby at 40 ( my little girl perfectly healthy) & I fell pregnant with no assistance with ivf or fertily drugs but some do need the assistance of these methods in our age group which is great that there are more options and my cousin who had finished having her children in her early 30's ( she had 3 boys) also fell pregnant unassisted medically & unplanned at 42 she had a perfectly healthy little girl & I also have a friend who fell pregnant again unplanned at 45 she also had finished having her children in her 20's & early 30's so was a real shock she thought she was going through menopause & she has a beautiful healthy little boy now with also grown up children & I also have another friend with grown up boys who tried again at 41 with new husband & she fell pregnant with no medical assistance & also has
a beautiful little boy so even though the statistics show how much more difficult it is its definitely possible I am example & have many around me also who have done it....Good luck :-)

Jodi - posted on 06/28/2013

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I am about to turn 45 and have a beautiful 1 year old daughter and a very outgoing amazing 4 year old daughter. I have much older children as well, but we started over. I did have to use some fertility meds but had great pregnancies with minor issues.

Adriane - posted on 06/28/2013

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I had a professor that had a surprise pregnancy at 52. She thought it was menopause until she went to the doctor. The baby was born healthy too. It's possible.

Maria - posted on 06/28/2013

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Thank you all so much for all this positive feedback. It was not my choice to start so late for so many reasons I can't get into but it was not to advance my career. In any case, it has always been my dream to be a mother. I am looking into all options but would really like a child of my own.

Again, thank you so much. I feel inspired and hopeful.

Christina - posted on 06/28/2013

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I have a friend who remarried in her 40s and became pregnant (accidentally) around 45. She cried and cried with various worries; always wanted a little girl, never had one. Now she has a three-year-old little girl and is so very happy. Being wiser than young parents, she gives her little girl so much of her time, completely selflessly with the understanding of how precious life is and how fleeting it can be. They are both well and in great health.

I feel that one of the greatest responsibilities of having a child in your 40s is maintaining good health as long as you can: eating well, no smoking or alcohol during pregnancy, drinking chlorella beverages and so forth to keep the energy level up so the chase is always in good spirits and the new little one can have a lifetime of Mom.

Sue - posted on 06/28/2013

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I would also recommend adoption - I'm 43 now and have two gorgeous little girls aged 4 and 1. They keep me on my toes and I do sometimes wish I was ten years younger but it really is all worth it!!

Michelle - posted on 06/27/2013

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I was pregnant at the age of 43yrs, with my 6th child, I must say it was extremely stressfull 9months not knowing what's gonna happen, but it was all worth it. In 2008 I gave birth to an awesome son all the stress for nothing, The birth of my Ethan was the highligt of my Life ... So plse be calm moms Miracles do happen....Michelle MacKenna

Niko - posted on 06/27/2013

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I understand you said first or second child. I have a cousin who gave birth to a 10 lb. baby boy two years ago. She just turned 48 las month. This is her SEVENTH child. The child before this one was born seven years prior and was the survivor of twins. It is my belief anyone can have a child (their own eggs) at any age.

Colleen - posted on 06/27/2013

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I had my son 14 years ago when I was 47. Now I am 61 rasing a boy on my own. My ex-husband is not involved. It is not a good thing for a boy not to have a man in his life. Let's get the message out there. Men need to be involved it is important to prepare our children for the next generation. Are you listening dead beat Dad's?

VANESSA - posted on 06/27/2013

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hi
I had a very scary experiance with my 2 year old she was crying but couldnt get her breath back and her lips went blue and she passed out for about 2 min i was so worried i blew in her face and she came right again why does this hapen ?

Eleanor - posted on 06/26/2013

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I had a unplanned pregnancy at 45 I carried full term. One of my medications I was on causes spontaneous abortion (for a health problem). I took it for several months because I did not know I was pregnant. I have a beautiful 4 year old today who is the joy of my life. There was a study done and people who have babies in their 40's tend to live longer.

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