pregnant and dumped

Hannah - posted on 07/06/2016 ( 3 moms have responded )

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I am 23 years old and am already the Mother of 3 beautiful children, I am also a survivor of dv. 15 months ago I began to date my old high school crush and fell madly in love, I thought I had finally met my Mr right after all the pain I've bein through. A couple months ago he rejoined the full time army and was posted to another state a month ago, before he left we got the shock surprise of finding out I was pregnant, I'm a bit of a what's done is done let's move forward kind of person and after suffering miscarriages years ago I knew I could never take the road of abortion so we accepted the pregnancy. But things took a turn when he reached Darwin , he swore aggressively at me after deliberately starting arguments, he started calling me names like bitch and became condescending, he became argumentative and unkind, but for the past week he seemed to have pulled himself in line until this morning when he dumped me out of know where. I know it sounds cliche but he is the love of my life and I'm so utterly devastated. I am alone, pregnant, scared, heart broken and in 6 months time I will become a single mother of 4. his parents are furious and ashamed of him, he is close to his mother and had told her before he left that he wants to marry me and that he planned to save for a ring while he was away, she was over the moon about me becoming her daughter in law. Know one saw it coming. I am so devastated and I don't know how to deal with all this grief and pain, I can't eat, I can't sleep and I am emotionally destroyed. My kids adored him and now I don't even know how to explain to them that I'm having a baby alone and that I'm no longer with the man that they loved and adored. I'm In shock and grief and I just don't know what to do. P.s I was on contraception when I fell pregnant.

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Ev - posted on 07/07/2016

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Marcia--I have to disagree with you on thee point of his not being able to see his child.

Marciabernice797 - posted on 07/07/2016

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I am so sorry for your pain and sorrow. That being said, this is not the guy for you nor should you want him around your children and future child. If he is as aggressive and mean as you say he is, do you want him modeling this behavior for your children? It might sound trite, but you are only 23 and have really only spent a little more than a year with this guy. You have so many years ahead of you. Would you really want to spend your future with someone who resents this pregnancy? Will this be the seed which sparks constant arguments? Your pregnancy hormones are also giving you a double whammy with this disappointment. Talk to your doctor. You must eat and be healthy for your unborn child and those beautiful children you already have. I'll be thinking about you!

Ev - posted on 07/06/2016

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What is done is done but I wonder if he used any protection too? All you can do now is concentrate on your new baby and the other kids. When baby gets here file for custody, child support, and visitation for dad. That is all you can do. Time is going to take care of the hurt of what he did to you. I think maybe you should not consider having a man in your life for a long time to come and conentrate on the kids.

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