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Ev - posted on 10/29/2015

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The other ladies have the right of it and I agree with them on the whole. You need to take care of yourself and your daughter. Try to make sure you have tried all things before calling it off. Counseling might make the difference here. But one person can not change another one. He would have to be willing to make those changes etc himself. That said, if you do leave, do get a lawyer and get the custody, child support and visitation set up. Sarah said if you were married you could get spousal support. I would double check on that because a lot of states or countries may not give that to the wife. Also surround yourself with support of friends and relations. This will help you emotionally, caring for the baby, and other things. Some of us, such as myself, have been through divorce/break ups and know how it goes. Family support and even that of friends is key to helping stay sane. even keeled, and like you still are a person though the one you thought loved you does not. Take time to be sure of what you want to do with your life and your child's. Do not go jumping to another man as soon as you can...you are emotional right now and that is basically a rebound.

Dove - posted on 10/29/2015

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I don't see another man mentioned anywhere...? it seems as if she is using the term boyfriend and husband to refer to the same guy...?

Sarah - posted on 10/29/2015

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The grass is always greener on the other side of the hill. This is so true. I would not advise leaving one man for another. I would advise leaving an abusive relationship. If you are married and not working you will probably get both spousal and child support. The father will and should still see her and have a relationship with his child, as Dove pointed out. So she won't be without her father and you won't be without financial support if you leave. However, leave for you, not for a man. I'd go, live on your own for 6-12 months and then see how you feel. Also, have you and your spouse tried counseling? You owe it to each other and your child to exhaust all options. The boyfriend may seem like a golden ticket, but the key to true happiness is you being happy alone.

Dove - posted on 10/29/2015

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If he gets physical... call the police and press charges. If he is physical w/ you... you need to leave... NOW. Get yourself into counseling and let him know that if he wants to be in a relationship w/ you he needs to attend counseling as well.

Your daughter will not be w/out a father... she still has an equal right to a relationship w/ him whether he lives w/ her or not. You will need to go to court and get custody, visitation, and child support all legally sorted out.

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