questions for step-parents

Janine - posted on 02/01/2013 ( 2 moms have responded )

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my hubby's ex is very vindictive and refuses to let his daughter have any kind of communication with him, his daughter use to spend weekends with us and our daughter and everything was fine until i got pregnant with our son now all of a sudden she does not want her daughter to have anything to do with her father,my stepdaughter who is 13 told me her mom said if she sees me or her father ob the road have nothing to say to any of us, it hurts me because my daughter ask about her sister all the time and i dont know how to respond, i have never spoken ill of them to my daughter who is 6, whenever she asks why her big sister cant come over i just say she is busy, recently i saw that my stepdaughter put up a post on facebook saying her dad does not support,which hurt me because we were still communicating on facebook, i personally think it was her mom that did it cause it was removed the next day, my hubby and i were in the process of filling for visitation but after he saw that post he got upset and decided to just let things stay the way they are, he says when his daughter is off age she will come to see him if she wants, i dont really want no baby mama drama, nor do i want to cause a fight with my hubby over me pushing him to go to courts, what should i do

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Jodi - posted on 02/01/2013

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You can't do anything. Only her father can. And if he doesn't want to file for visitation, then that's that. Give it a little time and try to talk to him about it again. By choosing not to file to see her, and making a conscious choice to wait until she is old enough to come to see him on her own, he is essentially abandoning her, and she WON'T come to see him, because that is exactly how she will see it - abandonment. Your husband needs to file for visitation. That IS the only thing you can do, short of abandoning her, which isn't the right thing to do.

I do want to ask, given your step-daughter made a comment about support, does your husband pay child support?

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Janine - posted on 02/01/2013

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mother does not want it, she just really gets on my nerves, we have receipts that we made her sign when he paid since she would tell people he was not giving her anything, so since we told her she had to sign to say she got it she refuses it, my stepdaughter approached us about wanting to come visit through a friend, because her mom would turn everything into drama, and i guess he wants her to do it again, but i am esentially just leaving it alone

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