r guy who wants to leave. help!

Jan24 - posted on 08/24/2016 ( 2 moms have responded )

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im a single mom. have a beautiful 7yo son. i divorced my husband when he was 2.i met a guy and have a relationship w him for 5 yrs or so. we lived in together for 3 yrs. it wasn't exactly happy bec eventually he left us w my son. after 4-5 months we got back together. he wants me to move to his place but i disagree bec obviously i got afraid. our relationship went on with lots of fights and arguments. after almost 2 yrs he went for vac to his country then he broke up w me through a fone call.i already suspected he have someone else or he is eyeing or saving himself to someone. but he denied. after he came back i thought he would visit us to talk or to see my son. but didnt happen. only after a month when i asked her sister to give my apartment and car keys. he came we talked. he didnt speak much but only said he was sorry. at that time i already chatting w someone else overseas. for passtime. to have someone to talk to. later on we had relationship online and planning to meet after 3 months. my ex then find out and talked to me and blaming me working on my conscience that i didnt wait for him. i was so mad at him for leaving us. and i also already heard stories about him w another woman. i know i loved him bit i hated him as well. i was decided to move on. or i was just thinking. then we parted. i met the guy i chatted with. but then it occured to i was still longing about my ex. i was like thinking maybe its all my fault esp. when i txted him asking how he was. that his girl broke up w her, he got car crash, his life was a mess and all. and when i asked if its bec of me and he said yes.
i got so devastated and hurt and i missed him so much. after almost a year of breaking up we talked and everything happened so fast that we got back together... again. just after i broke up with the guy i chatted with.at first we are sweet again. he's sweet again. and i said to myself i will do everything. but then i find out so many things. prior to our break up again i find out i was pregnant. and now i am on my 5th month of pregnancy.at first he will be the father a partner. and then later on he said to take it out bec he doesnt love me anymore. then we still continue. we planned to live together again w/c until now didn't happened. later on i find out when he was still in his country he was already w another girl w/c he said he was playing with in ps. i find out when he got back last year he went to meet the girl later on brought her to her house and stayed for a week after that he went to talk to me for the guy i was chatting and had a relationship with. and when he find out i talked to this girl a month ago, he was the one who is so mad at me tell me horrible stuffs how he hated me and how he doesnt love me. but still i gave him chance. before that too there was this girl he had a relationship in the club but still continue seeing her and talking to her. i still accepted that and gave him chance. bec of the child i am carrying. or maybe bec i am afraid to lose him or to be alone. we still continue. he's sweet then gonna change. sometimes his mind is somwhere else. sometime of that too, i find his messages to his friend, actually his other ex gf, that he feels trapped and that he's not happy about my pregnancy. i find that out just a month ago. but before that we was ok. he's the one who's telling its for family. he still makes love to me. treat us out. but it differs what he tells to other people.
and now just last night we had a misunderstanding ghat lead to argument, he then said again. he's gonna leave but will be there for his baby and for my eldest son. but he still stayed and call me baby still kisses me. then just after he left after a day it changes again.
i really dont know what to do. do i have to let him go? or i just not say anything and let him do what he wants to do? what about us? my feelings? the baby, my son? im already suffering emotional torture. pls help. any advice would mean so much to me

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Jan24 - posted on 09/07/2016

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thanks kathy.this means a lot to me.if only i could just let go.i dont wanna blame again for everythng.up until now,its more of im giving myself emotional torture.i wanna give on him.in this situation,how?all he ask is his freedom,then when i dont give care any longer,he would be here and looked so nice.everybody see him nice.

Kathy - posted on 08/26/2016

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I am so very sorry! You have been through so much for this relationship already...
Is there any way that you could get your boyfriend to go to counseling with you? No matter what happens, it would be good for you to go, alone, if necessary. You must realize that you are a strong, valuable, and important person. You can stand alone, if you have to. Honestly, you are way too valuable to be strung along the way this man has done. You deserve so much more than this! I wish you joy! I will be praying for you!

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