Raped at age 4. Talking about it at age 17.

Mara - posted on 11/05/2014 ( 5 moms have responded )

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My son was raped at age 4. Now he is talking about what happened-He is 17 years. He asks me a lot of questions. I try to give him the information he asks but being cautious because he wants to confront the man that raped him.

When he was assaulted by a 16 year old, he didn't talk a lot about what happened. The case was so grouse that he 16 year old was convicted as an adult.

Now that My son is remembering, he told me that the 16 brother was present watching him being raped. The brother was not prosecuted because my son didn't say anything at age 4.

What can I do??..The brother took part on this rape also.

Mara

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Sarah - posted on 11/05/2014

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If the brother participated in the assault, the statute of limitations may not be expired. If the assault was after June 1997, the range is 15 to 25 years. Contact your police department.
However, maybe the best help you can give your son is to move forward with a healthy attitude of what happened to him. That the assault does not define who he is or who he will become. I am not suggesting is forget and forgive, but work on moving forward. He may not ever remember exactly what happened during the attack. That you got some justice for him is better than no justice at all.
The only issue I have with leaving it be is the "brother" should be a registered sex offender. If your son wants to pursue it for this reason, go for it, but let him decide for himself.

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Priscille - posted on 08/19/2015

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Hi Mara,

I think Sarah makes some very insightful comments.

17 is across the age spectrum where young adults starts noticing things of a sexual matter with more interest. It probably the reason why he is asking more questions about it now and why he remembers more about it.

It is important that he doesn't get stuck in this assault and injustice that happened to him and is able to move on with a healthy emotional life that he deserves.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 11/05/2014

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His brother? or the brother of the perpetrator? If it was his brother...I'm not sure, except to facilitate his communication to his brother and not let his brother be in any physical or other contact with him (other than that communication/confrontation). And counseling may help. I'm not sure if a family attorney would be any help or not, but I'd certainly consult one.

If it was the brother of the perpetrator, help him confront, get him counseling, and get a restraining order against that person.

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