receiving a constantly sick child from the other parent

Jessica - posted on 04/06/2015 ( 2 moms have responded )

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Okay so let's start off with I've been with my boyfriend for going on 4 years. We have 2 children together now and he also has a 7 year old. For the past 4 years his son comes back from his mom's house sick, whether it be a common cold or vomiting and diarrhea He is always sick. I've tried to address this issue with her before but she seriously cried on the phone with me and turned it about her and how life is so hard and boohoohoo. I just wanted to make sure the kid is taking vitamins and is washing his hands but that conversation wasn't happening. Lately it has gotten worse, we get him Sunday night until Wednesday and after school he goes to his moms. We get him Sunday usually coughing all over the place with a running nose. We have him for those three days he goes back to his mom's, usually feels better the next week but then the week after that comes back sick yet AGAIN. So far just this year he's been sick 8 to 9 times. I just had a baby so I have an infant and a 18 month old. My daughter is rarely ill, she's only been sick a handful of times and every time is because her brother came back from him mom's sick. I know that children get sick and it's gonna happen but seriously this much? What do I do because I'm at a loss. My boyfriend won't talk to her about it and from the last time I tried her reaction made me sick to my stomach with her pitty party. I'm at the point I want to take my kids out of the situation. What's gonna happen when he brings something serious to an infant over here and my child is hospitalized or worse can recover and dies. Any ideas or thoughts? Please help

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Michelle - posted on 04/06/2015

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Firstly, it's not up to you to address it with the Mother, that is your Boyfriends job. If he won't raise the issue then you need to talk to him, not her.
Tell him that he needs to make sure everything is alright at her place and if things don't improve you need to think of your other children.

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Ev - posted on 04/06/2015

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I agree with Michelle. But has either his mother and father taken him to a doctor to check him for allergies or other issues that can last a long time. If your two kids were in daycare they would be just as exposed if not more so to all kinds of sickness (If you had to work and had no choice in the matter). Kids are very suseptable to colds all the time and if that is all he gets and comes home with, count yourself lucky. But to ask if he comes over with something worse and it requires going to the hospital and if the child got worse and never recovered or died is taking it a bit far.

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