Rocky relationship with boyfriend 6 months after baby

Singlemamma0620 - posted on 12/14/2013 ( 3 moms have responded )

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So I'm in desperate need of advise.
My daughter is 6 months old and me and my boyfriend are having some issues.
Things were good the first two weeks after she was born but now 6 months later he barely helps with her at all! Yes he will make the odd bottle here and there and odd diaper change! And yes he does work in the oil patch sometimes 16 hrs a day but when he's home on days off he is completely unless!
I'm so overwhelmed , I take care of our daughter all day cook clean , deal with our new monster to the family( puppy) I'm trying my hardest to be the best mom n " housewife " I can be but need a break so badly! I've asked him on his days off if maybe he can get up with her when she wakes in the am and literally snuffs me off! Not once has has gotten up in the middle of the night with her since she was two weeks old ! I left him two weeks ago telling him that I need help! Or we are done! He can't just lay on the couch all the time ! HE said things would change , and well... Nothin has changed! Even when she's "wet" all he says is oh ur wet an looks at me! Like Jesus if she's wet change her! I'm at my wits end ! I tell him I need a day for myself since he's had numerous in the last 6 months and I've had zero!
He stays in a hotel sometimes when he away from home for work and goes out drinking with his work buddies but I'm not aloud! To have a "me" day We live 30 minutes from town and he says I'm not aloud to make numerous trips in because I'm waisting money in fuel! Yet he can spend 200.00 on a booze tab at the bar!
Last night he was tired and said well I'm going to bed... U coming ? I was like no I still have to feed her change her wash her bottles for the morning ! I don't he to sleep when I'm tired ! But he sure does he will stroll off to Bed and leave me and her while he gets to slumber !
He spends more time playing with the dog than his own daughter ! And the twice now he's went down to his parents and I said well u wanna take he with u so I can have a shower and he said no I wanna go by myself the second time he said no she intimidates me! Not once has he ever gone anywhere alone with her!
I'm ready to leave him but trying to keep our family together ! What do I do? Does anyone else have this problem ?

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Rachel - posted on 12/14/2013

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Yeah that is scary, look into daycare and all that though. I don tknow where you are bu im in Boston and if u have 0 income theres places who will help you get back on track ( housing, childcare vouchers etc). But the thing witht hat is they want to know you have filed for childsupport. Just know that either way itll work out. Believe me theres days when I have noooo idea how anything is going to work out but it somehow does.

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Singlemamma0620 - posted on 12/14/2013

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Awe I'm sorry to hear that! U are one very strong lady and hope u have some great support behind u!
Ya I'm at my wits end! I'm becoming so resentful lately tht I can't even bare to be around him ! Only thig is I do not have a "paying" job so once my maternity is done I will have zero income! And I'm scared if I left I wot b able to support my daughter alone!

Rachel - posted on 12/14/2013

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Wow that is so sad, and so selfish of him. I cannot relate, as my sons dad passed away last year, so I do this on my own, BUT if he were around, and pulled that crap, I would go out of my mind! You are definitely not the first ive heard this from, as im sure it is really hard to just pack up and leave someone you have a child with! But GIRL, stand your ground! He made that baby too! If you have to leave him in order for him to "get it" do what you have to do!Also, beng a mom is the HARDEST thing in the world, and VERY stressful, so for him to just add on to that is selfish and him beng an ass*&^@!! sorry to say! I hope the best for you and your little one. Don't take no crap from him!

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