Mariusa - posted on 07/03/2014 ( no moms have responded yet )
Hello, I´m new to this community and would like to share something that´s happened to my six and a half year old girl in the hope you can share your views. Recently my daughter has been sad because of an issue with her best friend at school. She started complaining that this friend was being mean to her, not sharing much with her, and preferring to play with other girls at school. When she mentioned this to me in several ocassions she was distressed and unhappy. I said to her she shouldn´t pay much attention to it, that children do these things and all would be well in the end. But things didn´t improve, my daughter would come back home nearly everyday to tell me of yet something else that had happened with this "best friend". Sad and frustrated of seeing my daughter so stressed and unhappy about this situation, I just said to her that she would be better off ignoring this girl altogether or at least keeping some distance from her and start making other friends instead. Well, the next time this "best friend" walked away from my daughter to play with other girls leaving her all alone in the playground, my daughter, feeling hurt, told her what I have suggested: "My mom said I should ignore you, don´t pay attention to you...and this is what I´m going to do". Obviously, the "best friend" told her mother what my daughter had said. A few days after that, when the mom came to pick up her daughter, mine approached to ask her if her friend could come to our house one of these days (obviously the girls had forgotten their disagreements and were good friends again!) and her reply was this rude phrase: "we are not going to make plans with you or your mom anymore", and she walked away leaving my daughter in the brink of tears.
I understand that I probably should have kept away from this quarreling between children, but I felt I had to intervene and advice my daughter on what she could do given that she was hurting because of her friend´s behaviour, but now the situation is worse, because it involves the mom. I feel very sad for my daughter, I think this woman was cruel to my daugther, she could have talked to me instead and I now feel very cross at her. At the same time I would like to help my daughter, she insists this girl is her best friend, but it is obvious now that the mother doesn´t want to have anything to do with us. I wonder if I made a etiquette mistake and if it is up to me to have the initiative to get together with this mom and try to strenghten things out for the sake of our children. But I´m too cross at her for making my child cry in this way.
Can anyone share your views on this? Thank you.