Santa

Stephanie - posted on 12/03/2015 ( 6 moms have responded )

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When did your kids stop believing in Santa? My daughter is 11 and I had to dig through boxes in my cold basement two days ago at 5;30 in the morning to find her Elf on the Shelf. Does there come a point when I have to tell her so she won't be embarrassed in front of her friends?

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Sarah - posted on 12/04/2015

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I'd let her believe if she wants too. Kids have such short times where they can have fantasy and magical thinking, let her enjoy it. My youngest is 11, and do think it was just about a year ago when she figured it out for sure. Her older siblings were warned; If you blow this for any of the younger kids, your "Santa" budget will go to that child. they kept their mouths shut and played along. Everyone believed at one point so even if she is the last to know in her class, it's not like it's been only her for all these years.
St. Nicholas was a real person, and we celebrate his holiday tomorrow evening. The kids put their shoes out and St. Nick leaves a few small gifts and sweets. The history behind the Saint is an interesting story.

Ev - posted on 12/03/2015

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My kids learned early that Santa was imaginary. My daughter was 8 years old and in third grade when her teacher took it upon herself to tell the entire class that Santa or St. Nick had died a long time ago. I was so mad that the teacher took that away from me to deal with. But after she found out she went along with it for her younger brother who was 7 years younger than herself. When he turned 8 years old, he figured it out on his own.

I think it depends on the kid really. Today, kids are almost forced to grow up too quickly and not have a childhood. They are expected to go through the phases fast. So if a kid is 11 or 12 and believes in Santa still, let them have it. Let them figure it out on their own. Its the spirit of the year that is kept when kids wait a while to figure out imaginary and real things. I was much older than my kids once I recognized it for what it was. I turned out just fine. I believe in the imaginary things in life. They are what keep us young at heart.

Ev - posted on 12/05/2015

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I grew up believing in Santa and all that went with it. But I was also raised with the real truth of the reasons For the Holiday. Interesting enough, my kids were raised the same way. But in reality Santa is real. Not a person but Sarah E. said it nicely; Kids have such short times where they can have fantasy and magical thinking, St. Nicholas was a real person, and The kids put their shoes out and St. Nick leaves a few small gifts and sweets. The history behind the Saint is an interesting story.
It is in the spirit of this man that we give presents to others. He thought of others more than himself. And the spirit of Santa Claus is the same thing. So really there is a Santa...in spirit. And my mom told me this. She said that though it is not a real person so much as the spirit in which he does what he does and is who he is.

Raye - posted on 12/04/2015

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My husband did not want his kids to believe in fictional characters like Santa, but the kids' mom did. So they grew up believing. My SS is 8 and my SD is 11, and I'm almost positive they both know there's no Santa. But their mom's unofficial rule has been "if you don't believe, you don't receive", so they still pretend. We only give a couple small gifts from Santa, anyway, and the rest of the gifts are from us. That way, if they want to stop pretending with us, they will know they still get presents. Also, if they got all presents from Santa, and go to school talking about all the wonderful stuff Santa brought, and poorer kids didn't get much from Santa, then the other kids would feel bad. And that's unfair.

I learned really young due to overhearing my parents argue over it when someone at school told my older sister. Ever since, I was afraid of department store Santa's. But I still pretended to believe for years, because I wanted presents and everyone seemed to enjoy pretending there was a Santa.

There is almost no way to not traumatize your children when they learn about Santa. But you can can tell kids that the spirit of Christmas is real, and tell them about the real St. Nicholas. The IDEA of Santa is alive and well and is a representation of what is so important in terms of the spirit of giving, generosity, joy, kindness toward others, and love.

Macaria - posted on 12/03/2015

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That is a great question, I wonder the same thing about my niece. She is going to be 12 in a couple of months and I don't want her to feel embarrassed. Luckily, my husband and his ex raised my stepdaughter (who is also 11 yrs old) without Santa, the Tooth Fairy, etc. But she plays along for other kids. I would be interested in feedback from other moms...

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Stephanie - posted on 12/03/2015

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Thank you. I also feel like kids grow up to fast these days and
I will be sad when she stops believing.

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