School Dress Code

Jlhlhlhl - posted on 09/09/2017 ( 10 moms have responded )

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Hello,

I have a 13 year old teenage daughter.
She wears short shorts, crop tops, see through blouses to school and gets dress coded almost every day. What can I do? She changes her clothes when she leaves home so I don't see.

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Ev - posted 6 days ago

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Chris--school is not the time or place for kids to dress in a provocative manner. Kids should be dressed in clothing that is not a distraction. I do not care if it is crop tops and short shorts. Other distractions are on t-shirts that show themes not meant for a school atmosphere. Also dress codes help kids to learn what is accepted to wear in certain places and what is not for example would you see a business firm allowing crop tops, see through clothing and mini skirts or even t-shirts and jeans as proper attire for that firm. School was not really meant as a place to show off your style. It is a place to go learn.

Dove - posted on 09/09/2017

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Let her keep getting in trouble at school. Ask the school to call you when she has a violation and you can go to the school w/ appropriate clothing, have her change, and throw the inappropriate clothing away. Where did she get the money to buy the inappropriate clothing? You may need for the two of you to go through her room and you can remove everything that is a dress code violation and lock it up in your room (if she is allowed to wear these things on other occasions... at 13 the only thing I'd allow is short shorts (fully covering, but my girls are comfortable in them)) and only give her specific items on a non school day and have her return them to you after she wears them.

Have you asked her WHY she is insisting on violating the dress code repeatedly?

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Sarah - posted 6 days ago

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Chris- to point to the other side of the dress code: I am a school nurse in the second largest district in IL. Most of our school have a very specific dress code, almost a uniform; khaki pants, shorts or skorts; red, navy or white polo; no hoodies, no light up shoes. This is has been a great benefit to the students that live in poverty and only need a few pieces to get thru the whole year. While I do have some affluent students that show their wealth by wearing 300 dollar shoes, pretty much everyone just blends.
My own kids go to Catholic school; you want to talk strict? My 13yo wore navy blue socks that had a lace edge and she was given a uniform violation.
Also, why make this the boys problem? This girl does not have to dress like a tramp for boys to act like boys. Certainly the boys should be disciplined if they can't behave (no matter what anyone is wearing) But this issue is a girl deceiving her parents in addition to deliberately breaking school policy.

Chris - posted 6 days ago

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Damned dress codes. All they're there for is because makes apparently can't control themselves. Puhleeze!
Send the boys home if they can't get their shit together. Not the girls.

Fight the dress code! You're the one paying taxes. You're the one paying those salaries.

Sarah - posted on 09/09/2017

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Let her face the consequences at school and hand down some for deceiving you by hiding clothing. Why she needs to "dress to impress" might need to be addressed. if her self esteem is so low that she would dress for attention and receive negative consequences? She might need something to boost her self image.
An iPhone? At 13? Hell no!

Michelle - posted on 09/09/2017

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Are you really the parent?
You admitted that she's spoiled, well you have to live with the way you have taught her to expect everything, or you can step up and be a parent and say no to her.
You have created this attitude so it's up to you to diffuse it.

Dove - posted on 09/09/2017

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Hell no! No teenager needs an iPhone and she has already clearly demonstrated she is not mature enough to follow rules. Stop spoiling your daughter... no wonder she has no respect for the dress code. It seems you have given her no reason to respect authority...

Jlhlhlhl - posted on 09/09/2017

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Now she wants the iPhone 8 which costs $ 1000.
Should we get her this if we are paying her pocket money $55 a month?

Jlhlhlhl - posted on 09/09/2017

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Thanks Dove.
She dresses to impress.
As for the money, she is kind of spoilt.
I am ok with her wearing crop top outside of school

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