separation anxiety in toddlers how do you deal with it ?

Gina - posted on 08/14/2011 ( 1 mom has responded )

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My son is always with me so we are starting to develop a separation anxiety problem what's the best way to deal with this situation so we learn to avoid the major meltdowns !?!?

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Neva - posted on 08/14/2011

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First of all, separation anxiety is a normal part of development and it shows that your son is able to form attachments and is attached to you. This is a good thing. That being said, it is possible to start to lessen the impact of separation. Does your child have problems being left with other people or with you leaving the room for showers, potty, etc? or maybe both? In either case, your child is going to somewhat take his cues from you. If you hesitate to leave him, rush to pick him up right away when he cries, he's going to have a tougher time because he perceives that you, too, are having a tough time separating. I would tell him that you need to leave the room and that you'll be back. Then just put him down if you're hold him or just leave the room and go into the bathroom, say without any further ado. When you come out of the room, say, "see, I told you Mommy would come back." and then get him playing with something. Don't make a big deal. You should do the same if you leave him with a sitter. Don't sneak out of the room, because even though this is easier on you, it just reinforces in him that you might simply disappear. Tell him that you are going to go away for a short while and that you will be back. Then go. When you come back, give him a hug and kiss and either take him home, or let him play if he is already at home. He will eventually learn that you come back when you leave and the separation anxiety will decrease. Then when he's a teen and he doesn't want to do things with his parents you can look back on this time with nostalgia.

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